The sky is the limit

2011-06-23T13:41:00.000-07:00

Just some random thoughts...
There are times like this i feel the need to be alone. I believe watching certain dramas do affect my mood to a certain extent because today i feel disheartened for no reason. Cooped up in my room the whole day doing the necessary packing and brooding over some issues.

I am done with exams and all the travellings, now only to wait patiently for the time to return back to my homeland. Cant believe year 2 of my overseas studies have successful been completed. The journey hasnt been easy but i've definitely grow intellectually and personally. I dont know if it's a good thing because it sort of weakened my ability to relate to my close friends. There's a strange sense of awkwardness when i want to approach them to chat.

Photos taken way back during those days of fun failed to make me reminisce. The sad part of the whole experience was to look at your close friends photo and feel the unfamiliarity. I can't seem to relate to them... who are they?
I feel like someone who has lost her memory and this really bothers me.

2011-05-18T04:43:00.000-07:00

Taking stock of my life.
I've been thinking about some of my friendships, which unfortunately i believe are not worth keeping.
Because right from the start, they are not in my life so naturally they shouldnt be in my present or future.

And, it's a waste of my effort and time to associate with them.
A good friend, yes. A good friendship, no.

2011-03-15T11:32:00.001-07:00

This blog has been with me for roughly 7 years since my secondary school days. In those days, it was just an anger-venting tool for me to express my frustration in a veiled manner. (I am a very harmonious person therefore confrontation is just not my style.) Back then, I cultivated this habit to blog almost every single day because those happy moments in life are just too precious to be forgotten.

As i began my tertiary education, the frequency of blogging dropped. My time was constrained by the numerous work commitments: lifesaving, volunteering, academics stuff etc. Most importantly, given that more people are aware of its existent (somehow), i decided to preserve privacy by saving the entry as a draft when certain names are involved.
Unknown to many, I actually value personal space a lot.

Gradually, with the burst of technological network (twitter/facebook), this blog started to lose its significance. I realize my thoughts and emotions fluctuates faster than the stock market and that, what was written earlier on doesnt seem to justify my feelings later. Hence, there's a need to constantly update it, if not my close friends will come and ask about my well-being again.

As for now, i've kept most of my entries nonpublic by refusing to publish it. I reckon that it might be a better thing to keep my emotions and thoughts private. Since everyone is bugged by their own set of problems and it's inappropriate to raise up my own given that circumstance, I've learn to keep a lot of things to myself. As a result of constantly suppressing feelings, i find myself losing the ability to relate to anyone.

Don't worry, im fine ... as long as im at peace with myself :)
I create my own thoughts and hence i'll be the one straightening them out.

2011-03-03T09:57:00.000-08:00

I skipped lecture today since it would be a lot more productive and efficient to stay home and self study than to report for a 50min lecture which talks about UK economy. I miss my menses and all my emotions are screwed up. One moment i was elated with my newborn niece, the next i was feeling down about life. Just right, let me make use of this upside down emotions to set a serious mood to talk about some friendship stuff in general. This is not a entry to target on anyone, if you feel guilty, most probably you're one of them then. (Hah?)

Sometimes i fear people asking me about life bcoz there's really nothing to talk about. At least in my sense - not much of a fantasy. Watching drama used to a big habit of mine, gradually it loses its attractiveness. Itouch games cant sustain my interest either. Academic wise, reading is a real bore if i am asked to sit down the whole day for this purpose. I am simply sick of everything. Pretty much to say but reluctant to open my mouth, that's whole misery. Goods friends are too busy with their life (i presume) and cant be bothered to chat. If they do chat, either it's bcoz out of guilt or merely patronizing you. It's apparent because you cant see where the conversation is leading towards and replies are getting shorter and shorterrrrr. Actually, i dont need this kind of sympathy, get busy with life.

I mean it's kind of weird for me to feel lonely when i've a handful of good friends. Arent friends suppose to be there for you when you're in need of them? LOL yeah, so much of assurance but it boils down to nothing. People usually think it's an expectation issue but i certainly feel it's none of the sort. To show some concern for a friend, isnt it so much of an expectation?

Anyway, forget it. I am just trying to make myself feel better with the complaining.

2011-03-02T12:30:00.000-08:00

Chloe was born via cesarean today! My brother's heartfelt comments on the facebooks touches me and those pictures of my niece made me cry. LOL.
All i can say is... the baby appears gigantic. That's the result of very good meals when she was inside her mum's womb.

LOL i can imagine myself being an aunt but definitely not a mother. The idea of being a mum seriously (x100) scares me. Many times when i dreamt of being pregnant, my mind would be so disturbed the next morning. MADNESS.

Indeed blood is thicker than water. I kept thinking of the baby now. Poor aunt to be stucked in UK and not have the chance to be anywhere near her yet. Unless i give up easter trip for SG (which is impossible), if not the only chance of pinching her cheek would be 4-5mths from now.

2011-02-26T15:36:00.001-08:00

Today's my birthday!
Ironically, birthday always give me the pressure. I don't feel like celebrating it but then again it's my big day and i OUGHT to do smthing about it. Unlike my past birthdays, i only have 1 wish this year. Being pretty contented with life at the moment, that's no huge desire as yet. I mean the rest of my desire could wait til i am financially independent and not rely on my mum.
What's easy to get usually is not cherished so it's a better thing to fight for yourself.

Anyway, i've a blueprint of how my life should take off in the near future. :)
HSL, stay inspired!

2011-02-16T10:53:00.000-08:00

I realize there's a correlation between age and worries. It's like a inverse U shaped graph, as we age, we tend to have more problems on hand to think about. Until a certain point in life, somewhere near to the middle age, the amount of stuff on our mind decreases.

Overseas students generally have more issues to resolve. Right now, i am fretting over my accommodation options next year. Is student hostel a wiser choice than an apartment? Such a decision can branch out to a few implications. The cost is one issue because of depreciating pounds, rental in the whole of MCR has increased to a ridiculously level. In fact, i've considered a handful of it, but somehow somewhat my friend and I couldnt agree on one.

Wilmslow park for a 51 wk contract is around 5000+ pounds. NO for me.
Cosmopolitan is 4000+ but Rach abhors the freaking small toilet (exactly like those on flight)
Trinity court requires the payment for 3mths summer. NO for me bcoz i aint staying here during my hols.
Quadrangle is out for Rach who thinks it's dangerous.
Victoria Hall, the most ideal of all has been cancelled out bcoz it'll be fully rented out to MMU students.
Victoria point most probably will be rejected by me given its deserted location.

LOL i've tried my best la.
Let me just think about it again.

2011-02-08T06:04:00.000-08:00

Today's weather is lovely, the sky is blue and sun is out to say hello. On my way home, i saw some newly grown shoot budding out of the lush grassland. How long has it been since weather is this beautiful? How long has it been since we last take a look at the little nice things around us? At this moment in time, i feel very contented.

Been watchin lots of drama (Msia, Taiwan and SG) to kill time before real work really comes in. Some of the dramas triggered me to think about life and human nature. No doubt drama is way exaggerated and possibility of happening in real life is slim, but to a certain extent they do portray the mankind and their behaviors.

Personally, i think this year's cny is the most boring of all. Besides attending dinners and hanging out at friends' hse, there's this undefinable sense of loneliness. Regardless with or without friends' companion, i felt very empty. That's the real meaning of lonely - to be surrounded with good friends and yet still feel secluded.
Looks like ive another year of cny to miss in SG.

Yesterday night, out of nowhere i was reminded of secondary school days. I've a little problem trying to dig out the old past though. How we wish there's a time machine to bring us back!

A little gratitude now. Thank you my UK friends who helped me tide with the hard times when my flatmate was around. It's a little dramatic but im so glad it's all over. The 5min shall always be remembered.
Before i forget, i thank god for sending Tricia into my life. She has been a great pal who web cammed me almost every single day. Indeed, hey if you are reading this, GOOD FRIEND FOREVER! I thought it was so much easier to share thoughts with her since we are both undergoing similar experience.

2011-01-31T14:10:00.001-08:00

Hi there, i am back with another short entry. Nothing much, i've some time on hand to spare since it's just the start of a new semester. I reckon this semester would be a lot easier with only 5 modules on hand; this definitely justified a big sigh of relief. :)

Weekend was too short. Saturday was spent washing the bed sheets, doing laundry and cleaning the whole room which is inclusive of the toilet as well. I planned to have a detox session at the gym and pool on Sunday unfortunately i was down with some sickness. A pill didnt work so i popped in the 2nd one which sort of disrupted my sleeping pattern. I woke up at 3.30am and feeling way too alert, i stayed up till 7am to watch some drama.

Skipped the first lecture of the new semester because of a tired mind. In actual fact, i've been feeling down lately perhaps due to stress accumulation. Somehow i feel negative about the future, what will future holds for you? Sometimes it's not a matter of how hard you work to be successful. Luck plays an important part in everything we do, isnt it?
Maybe trying too hard doesnt help in anything.

I feel lonely in this world of mine.
Is there anyone out there who really understands me?

A bad feeling to have when you temporary lose your stand and aims.
I hope it's the tiredness of the mind and not life itself.
Good night to all :)

2011-01-29T17:46:00.000-08:00

At this moment in time, faced with the bitter cold in the middle of the night, i feel a little emotionally battled. I havent been doing a blog entry due to the usual hectic timetable and today all of sudden there's a strong urge to want to write it out.

Unknown to many, actually i came back to SG for my winter break. Not wanting to disregard my exam preparation, the number of time for meet up with friends is minimized. I dont really like to schedule an appointment when it's hard to agree on an exact date. Occasionally, i felt intruding on their life given the fact that most of them are so occupied with academic and relationship stuff. Gradually as time moves on, i realize that friends no longer matters as much as it was to me some time back. Maybe it's a sign of disappointment or could it be a changed perspective? When there's no mutual support in a friendship, it will wither away.

For a start, the first month of 2011 was characterized by many unexpected events. There were a few departures witnessed and experienced. Ultimately, the highlight lies in the preparation of 7 exam papers. Honestly, i didnt know my perseverance level was so high.
The gem cannot be polished without friction, nor man perfected without trials.

For the first time in my life, i've new year resolutions. :) The purpose of which is to have constant development personally, emotionally and intellectually.
I want to be proud of myself again.

2011-01-06T09:41:00.000-08:00

I come to believe that sometimes life is out of our control. You really have no idea what the future holds for you. The idea of furthering my studies abroad and in such a faraway country like UK has never crossed my mind. I would have never guessed that my both my brothers would marry foreigners.
There are just too many unexpected events going on in my life that i find it hard to accept. Just today, i bought a Motorola phone. Can you understand the feeling of buying something which you never thought of owning it? Never have once would i be interested in taking a look at Motorola brand, in fact for the past few times at the store, i was choosing between either sony ericsson or nokia. And so today, i myself was caught off guard by my sudden decision to purchase Motorola device.
Sometimes i prefer things to be more predictable, but either way, i believe i can take it well.

2010-12-05T14:37:00.001-08:00

When winter kicks in, the long night gets more lonely and depressing. Emotions fluctuate so much that a moment ago you can get so traumatized by something and the next, you are elated by a trivial thing. Due to weather conditions, i tend to put on weight here. Reason being, when the weather is cold, you crave for more food and in particular sugary stuff. To worsen the situation, it's hard to sweat here, implying the possibility of water retention and other toxins from accumulating in the body.

It snowed last week and i thought it was really a magnificent scene - the impression that fairy tales come alive! Suddenly, i've no idea how to go about cherishing that amazing moment.
A christmas filled with snow white wonder would be exceptionally perfect if my dear ones are here. A wishful thinking though but that aint gonna diminish my enjoyment of the season. That night, i was deeply in love with the snow.

A month of christmas holiday!

2010-11-26T15:38:00.000-08:00

My absence from blogging could be explained by the heavy academic work and limited internet access. LOL i've been on the run these few days, not as if i owe people money and too embarrassed to say it here but it's truly a long story that i got tired of repeating.

The few days stay over at Rach's house was loved!!! I've to admit my daily routines are much more predictable and appears to be one when i moved into their place. We have a time to watch tv over dinner together as well as time for individual mugging. Even when one of the kitchen's lights went out, the tranquility in the common room is still able to boost my concentration level.
Honestly, deepest gratitude goes to the 3 of them for being so altruistic. If not for them, life in UK would have been much depressing. THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

2010-11-08T13:01:00.000-08:00

So i am someone who cannot accept failures or generally, the downs in life.
It's heart wrenching.

I tried changing or looking at the brighter side of life but apparently it's hard to let go. At least not for someone like me with loads of burden and responsibility.
What's more is there to say?

I know i would stand up again, it's just a matter of time.

2010-11-07T12:42:00.001-08:00

At point of low times, it's so comforting to have friends around you cheering us up. Just like today, i was hit by a very bad news and got disappointed over someone. Mel T lent me her ears via skype and despite not being able to help, i appreciate her effort to hear me out attentively. Jas L on the hand consoled me with some msges which though was random but could sense the sincerity in it. Tian L tried her best to keep me entertained first with chestnut which she claimed were specially 'microwaved' for me and the next was preserved mango sweets. ^_^
Rachel initiated to cook for me every week and bring over to my place. LOL considering how far apart we live, that's very touching.

Now that's the whole point of friendship, isnt it? Small actions like these have enormous impact.
Thanks for everything :)

2010-11-02T02:08:00.000-07:00

I cant understand why the tiff we have occasionally involves outsiders' matter. Your concern would have been appreciated if you could understand my current circumstance and perhaps, my model of the world.

The whole of my yesterday was half ruined after the conversation we had. The disappointment i experienced was so great to have me shedding a few tears. To escape the reality of the world, i force myself to sleep early. There's nothing i wish to think of at that moment.

As a matter of fact, at low point like this, i longed for someone/something for me to express sorrows. Such as messaging to another universe and not get a response or get a pen pal whom i've never seen before. Yes, i am implying on the privacy of the matter which is too personal to be shared with my close ones. (Or is it not?)

Just like you, im afraid of history repeating its old self.
I feel for so much and have plenty to say, unfortunately... there's no point in saying.

2010-10-30T09:04:00.000-07:00

Out of boredom, i went online to get some updates of Selina's condition. It touches my heart to learn that true love does exist in the world. Her fiance is a typical example of a good guy, at least based on how i perceive it. According to the report, her fiance is by her side every day and determinedly promised to marry her next year as planned. OH WOW.
Sometimes ive the perception that most guys are very superficial; very often they like girls for their physical beauty. To be able to find a guy that does not focus on this factor is truly a blessing for the girl. I THINK.

Apart from missing my flatmate like crazy, there's nothing much in my mind today.
I miss her for knocking on my door every day for no valid reason like... she wants to see a human before entering her room. LOL.
I miss her blabbering when i insist to frighten her with my ghost stories.
I miss having her in the kitchen telling me some crap while i do cooking and after which we'll dine and further share our stories together.
I miss our bickering and some stupid form of physical contacts.
It caught me by surprise that i actually miss her nonsense!

Indeed it's true that after we lost something/someone, we get to acknowledge the real value of that object/person. This is the 2nd time in my life for experiencing this, the first was during poly days. How can i forget this lesson?! What for search so far when that something is just right next to you? Then again, how sure are we that it's the right one?
I regret for rejecting her kind initiatives to hang out together - movies, museums, zoo, sight seeing, gym, grocery shopping etc. Worse still, i went all these places with some other people whom I didnt agree to meet beforehand. :(
So currently my plan is to turn up at Bath with her after she's back from Paris and hopefully then, i would be idling around.

2010-10-29T13:47:00.000-07:00

Had a great hang out with my flatmates and other girl friends at this chinese restaurant serving Hunan Cuisine. I cant remember the number of dishes ordered but the bill amounted up to 120 pounds. LOL!
I think in general, our friendship with each other has strengthened. The thought of my flatmate leaving the house for 6 days upset me. I didnt know i would mind so much.

2010-10-27T15:05:00.000-07:00

LOL few wks ago i was literally laughing at my flatmate for her habit of skipping lectures. Now, both of us completely swapped role. I dun rem myself encouragin her but she tapped hard at my shoulder to thank me for inspiring her. Huh?
Shouldnt blame it on anyone since this is my choice. :) I still have my doubt over the correlation between grades and num of classes attended. Not true!
The best part of anything and everything is to be flexible, isnt it?

Had a 3 hr long dinner together with my best flatmate, Tian Lu tonight. To be truthful, i look forward to interacting with her everyday. There's an exceptionally peculiar feeling of uneasiness for not striking a conversation with her and i believe she feels equally odd for not sharing her food with me. What a friendship~ LOL.

Wang Jing, another flatmate of mine entered into our conversation bringing up the geomancer in Trafford Centre whose prediction is dead accurate.
WJ: My friend went there and he could tell from the start she has a bf with the surname Zhang!
TL: Did he speak in English like 'your bf has the surname zhang?'
WJ: Yeah that guy did!
Me: Tian Lu, you should go. He might be able to say - You've a singaporean flatmate. (Imitating her English accent)
TL: Yeah and he will continue... yeah and she may have a crush on you.

LOL given that atmosphere then, it was so hilarious. I really didnt expect her to say that. :D
The story continued when i insisted on telling ghost tales to the both of them. Knowing that begging me doesnt work, TL asserted that if i continue on with the stories, i would have no bf. That's a very nice one. And with all the constant jeering and criticisms, we now address each other as lesbian partners.
Come to think of it, do you think in general, an individual would really become a homosexual for constantly flirting with friends of the same gender? Hmmm

To summarize up, ive 5 people asking me about my relationship status today. Till now, i cant understand why this topic is such a hot favorite. Is it against the norm for girls of my age not to be seen dating or is it only targeted at me?
Personally i think it's way too exaggerated for a friend to sms me in the night regarding this issue. Worse still, I had to spend a few smses doing unnecessary clarification. -.-

2010-10-26T11:36:00.000-07:00

Of all days available for me to fall ill, my body chose today, which is the busiest day of this week. There are 2 lectures and 2 tutorials comprising of 5 hours to be spent in school. In the morning, i already sense something was wrong with the sudden drop in my body temperature. To worse my situation, it started drizzling, hitting a bottom low temperature of 8 degree Celsius outside.
For the 1st time, i wore 4 pieces including the thick coat in autumn. I come to believe that what was said about the prediction of UK weather is true. This is gonna be the coldest year in the 50 years.

With energy draining out of me every minute, i decided to skipped the lecture in the evening. The tutorial before that was disappointing because i really couldnt last it through. Apparently halfway into the lesson, my eyes were on the point of shutting down. I must have a knowledgeable or well prepared outlook today because all the tutors specially picked me to answer question. -.-
In one of the tutorials, i went to hang out with Cora Sim because i miss GJR. The way Cora carried herself is exactly how Junru will do it, given our friendship. When Cora bade me a goodbye, i felt a sudden tinge of sad. Am i thinking of Junru or is it because Cora is so nice to chat with?

Just when i was too sick to cook, my flatmate offered me a bowl of hot sweet porridge. AWESOME. Instead of spending the afternoon resting on my bed, time was spent in the kitchen to chat. She asked if i like to spend summer in her hometown, Yunan. Oh wow that moved me a little. All along i've the belief that as long as your friend invite you to his/her house, it got to say a lot about the friendship. Only trusted friends are allowed into our personal space, isnt it?

Contradictorily, i've not invited all good pals to my house not because my inner world is so heavily guarded but... i've not had the chance yet. LOL. That's just for clarification purpose in case some friends feel left out or not cherished.
i seldom initiate doesnt mean you guys cannot propose. :)

I feel really happy tonight, perhaps because of the pleasant interaction with my flatmate. Would i get slapped by Rach if i break my promise to stay with her next year? A few eligible friends are on my list actually. All of them can whip up good dishes and most importantly we share chemistry ;)
Ok i am kidding, Rach is fellow SG friend!

2010-10-25T12:54:00.001-07:00

Did i mention i've this really funny flatmate whom live opposite me? Occasionally she knocked at my door for a random chat, im fine with it since i cant stand boredom too. She talked about experiencing inferior complexity while reading the email i drafted for her. She wanted me to recommend her English materials to improve her English. Honestly speaking, it has been such a long time i read an english story book. Magazine of all kinds (including men's health) yes but definitely not those love novels which i used to enjoy reading years back.
Anyway, just now she enquired if i would like to study with her in the kitchen. I got the sudden urge to laugh out loud because it sounds like a funny idea to me. Of all place, she named kitchen. Ok i m very touched by her act to cook me dessert every now and then.

Jas L came up to Manchester last weekend. It was such great disappointment not to see her in glasses. HAHA that's the century's joke. Itinerary was pretty straightforward and simple since time is a constraint here. In this 3 days 2 night trip, we covered Casino, Trafford Centre, a Chinese temple, City Centre and had some house visiting. Popping in the Museum of Museums featuring the Tutankhamum exhibition managed to make up for the loss in missing out the LEGO discovery land and Old Trafford.
Ah and i wanna thank Rach & girls as well as Didi & gang for playing host to us. :)

2010-10-19T14:42:00.000-07:00

Tonight i had a great long chat with all my flatmates in the kitchen. The first one to freak out and suspects paranormal activity in the hall is me. Now, subconsciously another 2 of my flatmates got influenced and felt threatened. Apparently, the girl from room 1 complaint about noises from next door. She thought it was fine until i corrected: There's no more rooms and buildings next door, as a matter of fact, she's at the end of the hall.
My best flatmate, the one staying opposite me grumbled about the blatant and persistent noises next and top of her room in the middle of the night. That makes sense until the girl living next to her said she heard none. She insisted on hearing resounding noises at the corridor every morning when no one heard it. Or rather, it's impossible for anyone to enter our hall without permission.

LOL the laughable thing was, she knocked on my door to have me accompany her to the kitchen. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
It's something like:
Me: Yes, how can i help you?
Tian Lu: Hey seling, sorry i just wanna talk to you. I felt so uneasy when i entered my room just now, just needa tell you this. I just pasted the amulet on the wall. Scary. Haha can you come along with me to the kitchen?
Me: I thought it isnt human knocking on my door. LOL!
Tian Lu: Ahhhhhh dun talk

Upon hearing the effectiveness of the amulet, she immediately went to seek one from another flatmate. Yeah thanks to me, everyone, except the girl in rm 2 is psychopathic now. Instead of dismissing this conjecture, we worsen the situation by discussing it. :D

It's unbelievable that Tricia couldnt guess my niece's christian name when she's closely linked to a perfume brand. As far as i know, currently Tricia is the only girl who has the best knowledge for perfume. Haha so isnt it quite of disappointing when she could guess it right? Still, it's eyeopener again when she could easily name out the uncommon perfume brands at one go. ;)

Just wanna make a list of what i've used before.
Dolce & Gabbana number 3
Dolce & Gabbana rose the one
Hugo Boss deep red
Calvin Klein euphoria blossom
Calvin Klein eternity moment
Anna Sui pink lady
Tommy Girl jeans
Body shop - various combination
Now i see why Tricia and i are such good friends HA HA HA
I look forward to expand my perfume collection with her ;)

2010-10-18T11:45:00.001-07:00

Current situation: Bad shape.
For 2 consecutive wks, ive been having nightmare every single day. At first i didnt doubt anything wrong since it could be attributed to my high stress level. Subsequently, the level of horror in the dreams intensified. From abnormal accidents to spotting coffins and the last one was being trapped in a haunted yet fantastical Haw Par Villa. Yes, i assure you about trying to stay as relaxed as possible. Unfortunately those nightmares didnt stop. To be honestly, regardless whether Jas L is reading or not (HAHA), i swear that this string of nightmares only started after the trip back from warwick. As for now, i started to get paranoid when a flatmate of mine had similar problem. The fact that another flatmate freaked out when i mentioned this topic added on my superstitious belief. Hence, with my courage badly attacked, yesterday i slept with the lights on.
Is it my psychological problem or there's something about the whole hall?

Academic pressure, missed of menses and nightmares are the main sources of stress. I've no idea which factor leads to which so in hope of maintaining a healthier mind, i'm doing exercise every week. Honestly, I forgot how it's like to suffer menstrual cramps after missing it for a month plus.
Anyway I really wanna thank the girls for rendering me all kinds of support despite their hectic timetable: Hanhui accompanied me to the gym yesterday and after which Rach brought me to the pool area with spa/suana/steaming facilities. ^^
Simply cant thank the 3 girls enough for everything. Never calculative, always generous and forever thoughtful.

Though sometimes i like to laugh at their... silliness? Just like yesterday, while indulgin in the spa, this Indian guy in his mid 30+ came up close to me for a chat. I'm aware that Rach hinted to me to leave but given the fact that the guy was constantly asking qns and engaging us in the conversation gave me no chance to cut it up and do a rude exit. SO i kept on waiting for her to initiate to move since she was so near to the ladder. Of course she didnt and when i can no longer withstand the hungry pangs, i walked up and made an impromtu exit. HAHA no chemistry.
I realize strangers who approached us like to ask if we are single. For safety measure, i always answer them: YES. LOL!
That's a beautiful facade :)

2010-10-14T13:21:00.000-07:00

I felt moody the whole afternoon today. People who followed my tweets should be aware of the issue. Fortunately, a friend of mine brought me out to play. Actually that involves shopping and a temple visit. Nonetheless, it's good enough to cheer me up :)

Cancelled a dinner session with Indo chinese friends because of the reason as well. Everything has been good but i feel... tired.

2010-10-13T12:37:00.000-07:00

The next one to offer me either chocolates or dairy products shall be rejected flat. Ahh do you guys know i am lactose intolerant? To summarizes up, i've eaten the chocolate cookies by Hanhui & Rachel, the freshly made fruit smoothies and pumpkin (which contains milk) by my flatmate and the chocolate fudge bar by another flatmate. The effects are not that dramatic but still significant.
I cut down my antiobiotic consumption to once a day instead of twice because it causes very bad headache and rapid heartbeat. (The pressure on the brain is higher hence giving rise to more powerful blood circulation) Last night i decided to follow the doctor's advices and popped in another pill before sleep. When i couldnt sleep through the night before the medicine takes effect, i had a hell time. Blame it on myself :(

After days of bleaching, I've finally removed the yellow stain in my beign shorts. That's the drink which destroyed Melissa T's Polaroid. LOL what a retribution.

Sometimes i feel my sixth sense is pretty accurate. I had a feeling of bumping into Lyn when i entered the supermarket and indeed, there she was, doing grocery shopping with Rachel.

After webcaming with Phebe, i realized too much emphasis have been placed on my UK and poly mates to the extent of neglecting my secondary school Alxis clique. The moment she took out our group photo, i experienced a sudden sense of guilt. Aww im very apologetic about that. :( Still, they are my diehard buddies because we have known each other for the longest period of time! Above all, we were acquainted during our naive young times in secondary school where the chances of having genuine friendship is higher. Nowadays, many undeniably make friends with an ulterior intention - for connection. To me, that's a very commercialized term though I fully understood the practicality of the world. Nevertheless, i thought friendship should be formed purely in the enjoyment of each other companionship, and further fortified by mutual trust. Isn't it not?
As the name suggests, Alxis clique was formed out of a history based discussion. (or was it argument?) It's a combination of Allies and Axis Power. LOL! Despite all the unhappiness that happened at times, i insist that they gave me the best of my memories :)
I'll always treasure this unbreakable bond.

Happy Birthday Jasmine Lin!
Be inspired and live life like there's no tomorrow ;)
Attain your professional degree and show off to me in the future :D

2010-10-12T12:25:00.000-07:00

Ive the feeling that i bumped into all my UK friends this morning. It was Chen chen first, followed up by adi and then rebecca...(the list goes on)
Anyway in one of the classes where i was the only year 2 students, it was surprising to have a few asian classmates who approached me for my contact numbers. I shouldnt doubt their motives but still, i bet they needa someone experienced to guide them along. :P Call that fate or what, one of them whom i feel can chat with actually resembles my dead friend GJR a lot. Not only are they from Msia, both also have the same built and outlook. It's supposed to freak me out but i feel blessed to see 'her' once again. (Yeah i know everyone is unique and she's not my dead pal)

Misread the venue for my class later and instead of being early, i ended up in the otherwise situation. One day if i never make such a careless mistake, i would seriously praise myself for it. That's an indication of the need to start using my notebook soon.

The last lecture was such a bore with all the theory and elaboration. Fortunately i was kept awake by Rebecca's complaints. She told me about her uneasiness when J, our mutual friend initiated to sit with her in lect hall. LOL her woes turned out to be such a joke to me and i had to brainstorm on ways she could avoid her in the future. The story goes like this when she met J on the street one day...
J: Hey where you going?
Rebecca: To take a jap course
J: What? You? Are you serious???
Rebecca: Yeah why not?
J: You cant even speak English!

Needless to say Rebecca felt really pissed off with this statement. As you can see, it takes only a sentence to differentiate those with high EQ and those without. That's the conversation between a BBC and a China girl. Unaware for most, i felt we could learn a lot from China people, for instance their culture, lifestyle and attitude. As a result of having all China national flatmates and more of such friends, i realize i could pick up their English accent pretty well. And i like it more than my own accent.
Sorry my flatmate has bribed me with loads of her homecooked food so naturally i feel the need to put in a few good words for her nationality. LOL ^^

Been having nightmare every single day now. Previous night was a dream about my mum and brother getting killed in a car accident. 2 days ago, i dreamt that my pal's dad got lost in MCR while taking the rail. Tell me this is stress.

2010-10-10T14:57:00.001-07:00

To make up for that dinner few days ago, i turned up at Rachel's place this afternoon. We had a swim at this private pool first before hitting the spa and sauna. This is truly heavenly. For instance, the pool is heated and has a marble floor which gives an overall beach feeling . Adding on to our bliss, there were only 2 of us enjoying the relatively large pool as compared to public pool. Worrying about the hygiene level, i left the hot spa after 10minutes. Sauna was next but with a lower heat tolerance level than i do, Rachel requested that we exit the place after 5minutes. LOL seriously, i fear my glasses is gonna melt any minute.
The whole swimming session was absolutely relaxed. ^^

While i bathed in Lyn's room, the 3 of them (Hanhui, Lyn & Rachel) were in the kitchen whipping up palatable dishes. Since i didnt cook, i volunteered to wash up and perhaps went a bit overboard to the extent of cleaning up for their flatmate. LOL! Hanhui wanted to try her newly bought volka so we had a bit of drink before consuming the barley dessert. What a combination.
Nice people like them made the effort to walk me home in that cold dark night. Just like what i always tell them - every moment spent with them is golden. :D

Everyone's heading home during winter and it has been predicted by some researchers that UK is gonna experienced the coldest winter in 2000 years. I've no idea how on earth i will manage through the lonely winter but since i could courageously rejected my mum's offer to get me an air ticket, i believe somehow somewhat i can endure through. You guys out there, just remember to skype me more often la :D
Ah hsl, you can do it.

Nightmare works perfectly if it's meant to get me up on time. This morning i had the worse nightmare ever and to certain extent i believe it has got to do with the twitching of my eyelid. If saying out is gonna break the curse, then i m so gonna do it now. I dreamt about bringing my mum and niece to the underwater world and the bizzare thing happened - the glass of the aquarium broke! The scene with large volume of water rushing down on us gave me a shock huge enough to wake me up in horrified state. Ah so i do fear for my family's safety.
-.-

2010-10-09T10:35:00.001-07:00

In spite of the piled up tutorial work, I spent half of the day chatting with my mum today. She was very excited to show me her newly bought plant via msn webcam session. A pity i didnt manage to take a glimpse at our garden but still i'm glad that she's happy over at SG. :)
It's truly a blessing to have such a selfless mother who can give me both emotional and financial support. :)

Deepest apologies to those girls i've to abandon at the last minute for yesterday dinner. It took me quite some time to decide on which dinner to attend since i really love to hang out with the usual clique. Unfortunately i feel the need to be fair to my flatmate who initiated this dinner earlier on this week. A friend of mine proposed the idea of me settling my dinner out first. AH morally, i feel it hard to deceive her because she sounded so sincere in making dinner. For instance, i told her about returning home late. Instead of fuming inside out, she compromised by cooking later and promised that dinner would be ready by the time i reached home. Honestly, im freaking touched. If he's a guy, everything is gonna be perfect HA HA HA.
The dinner lasted for 4 hours and we had fun chatting about SG and China. Out of generosity, i offered her the 2nd last piece of ba gua which i brought from SG. As compared to the dinner she cooked and those food stuff that she wanted to give me, this is nothing. (or is it not? HAHAHA)
Appreciation, appreciation and still appreciation to all my friends for everything.

My left eyelid has been twitching for almost a week. From experience it ought to be bad omen but currently everything has been going on too well for me. Yes, now i fear LOL. What on earth am i gonna to lose? Whatever it's, i stick to my philosophy: just take it as it comes ;)

If only textbooks are iweekly for me to gt hooked on and read from front to back and vice versa everyday. LOL

2010-10-06T09:25:00.000-07:00

I had a first scare of the day. Melissa T called me in the afternoon when i was having a nap. That moment when i woke up, i thought my alarm clock went off and i've missed lecture. On the computer it reads 4.30pm. For a while in a daze, i was asking myself: is that UK or SG time? LOL! Oh well, that happens quite frequent in my Year 1 so there's a phobia here. HSL, you are such a joke.

Last weekend was well spent in Warwick with Jasmine L. In summary, let me be politically right - everywhere has their own culture. MCR though isnt as safe but it's pretty exciting: your chances of meeting lunatics are higher.

To kickstart my long academic year, i've learnt a few lessons. Sometimes it's not the things that are complex but the people are complicated. My undecisive and careless nature cost me both $ and time. Besides the trip down to Warwick, i've screwed up the planning of my timetable. No matter how much i feel like reproaching myself, i still refrain from doing so. You can hate everything but not yourself. I know subconsciously all these self criticism is gonna eat into my confidence level. As for now, I only wish to treat every issue on hand seriously, giving everything a thought before execution.

Ah detention party was such a blast though the turnout wasnt as great as last year. There were more unfamiliar faces but thankfully the clique i went with were really awesome. In a way, they will never leave anyone of us alone anywhere in the club. Two guys accompanied me to the predrinking session and 3 guys sent me back. Thanks for everything, pals :)
Anyway, while waiting for Leon at my place, i bumped into 3 englishman who wanted to 'pick me up'. It was meant to be scary but i felt funny about the whole process. HAHAHA

I wonder if my flatmates know that there's no housekeeping service. Apparently, i've been the one clearing the garbage every single day. -.- How should i go about hinting this?

2010-09-27T15:57:00.001-07:00

Monday
On my first day of school, i misread my timetable and almost turned up 1 hour earlier for school. I dunno hw you would describe the feeling being in a lecture with no available seat and had to miserably sit on the stairs. And to add on, I am a year 2 student doing a year 1 module in that lecture. The positive side of the story is: i had the option to take on year 1 modules, so why waste it? LOL.
For my 2nd lecture, i overslpt by 30mins and ended up being late. The coughing made me really exhausted. After school, during a conversation with some pals, realization dawned on me that it matters a great deal to say 'I've a new bf' instead of 'I change my bf'. LOL.

This semester's modules are very intimidating - it made me wanna faint. What on earth are those formulas and diagrams? Having said that, the frequency of blogging might be lesser in the future. Find me either on facebook or twitter then :)

Ok hsl, get well soon.

2010-09-27T15:08:00.000-07:00

Sunday
Scotland trip was quite enjoyable especially when the sun was shining radiantly in both Edinburgh and Glasgow. The latter was based more on the bus tour, bringing us to many site of attractions, for instance university of glasgow, science centre, people's palace etc. Edin on the other hand was more exciting and it's a big regret not having sufficient time to take on the countryside tour.
Hence, this vacation was based more in the city, exploring the underground vaults which are said to be haunted -.-, prominent edinburgh castle with a dog cemetery inside as well, winery heritage centre and both old and new town of edinburgh. I spent roughly 300+ sgd, inclusive of accommodation and travelling expenses on a 3 days 2 night tour. :O The fish and chip at Glasgow had gave me a bad sore throat, to worsen it up, i had 5 diff types of whiskey in edin which totally left me voiceless.

I certainly gained much insights going on this trip. PS: Many thanks to my photographer for all the awesome shots, they are really amazing. Just like any other trip, how i wish all my best buds and family were there with me, admiring the little good things in life.

2010-09-23T17:35:00.001-07:00

I bet lotsa people are going for a getaway to Edinburgh this weekend because most hotels are left with no availability. Since demand exceeds supply, the hotels over there can jack up the prices. As a result, we are paying 86 pounds for just a night in Edin. -.- The trip up scotland will take us 5 hours or so, so with our 3 days holidays we thought about targeting Glasgow as well. Glasgow first before Edinburgh. :)

2010-09-21T11:01:00.000-07:00

A new bedsheet here costs me only 4 pounds and doing the laundry is 3 pounds, so tell me would you wash or change a new set? LOL. Believe it or not, i just bought a carton of instant noodles. It might have been too extreme or out of the norms because my friend went dumbfounded.
Anyway, I had a bloody scare this afternoon. There is this dog which has the face of bulldog but the size of a terrier came up close with me. It looks really ferocious and was charging towards me. If not for the presence of the owner who was looking pretty calm then, Didi and Andy might have already slaughtered the dog. It's pretty comforting to have tall guys(1.8m+) walking beside me.
A friend of mine treated me lavender bubble tea today! ^_^

Currently, i hate Natwest, Hsbc and Vodafone. Hsbc actually started to charge me 8 pounds per month for providing some services. Natwest on the other hand wanted me to produce some university letter as a claim of being a student with them. I can offer them my student card, letter of accomodation and passport but they insist on the university letter. WHAT IS THIS?
Vodafone was another failure though i'm their diehard loyal number 1 fan. Just for your info, my friends have tried extremely hard to persuade me into changing my service provider to O2 (the company who sponsors some football club).
Ok so, they refused to offer me better benefits despite being with them for a year. Having changed my address thrice, i couldnt really remember which address i registered with vodafone. That goes to say because of this little confusion, the account authentication with my bank has failed me miserably.
I am not a fresher leh, why do i have to go through so many crap again?

My flatmate knocked on my door and JIO me out (haha) to celebrate mid autumn festival with her friends tomorrow night. Past experience has told me to accept the invitation. My flatmates of Pankhurst (last year) once invited me out to check out the bar, having turned down their offer, they didnt find me anymore. No, it's not about the desperation but perhaps i should make friend with myself and not appear too aloof, which i know many of you think so.

If everything goes on fine, i am spending weekend at Edinburgh understanding the spirits that haunts the castle etc. LOL. Been spending the past few days at a friend's house playing mahjong and chatting. :) Life's beautiful, at least for the moment.

2010-09-20T03:22:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was the first time i took a train on my own. Sometimes travelling alone is cool, though occasionally loneliness might attack me. I was supposed to pick 2 pals up from the airport at 820am but ended up we met at 930. No, i didnt overslpt but the rail at Oxford station starts at 9am and my train will only arrive at 9.20. LOL so there i was half awake at the station waiting around 1 hour with no mp3 and book. I didnt waste any time spacing out but sat at the waiting room planning on the family vacation in 2 yrs time. Maybe the weather was too cold, maybe i was too slpy or maybe i didnt get over the departure etc etc etc, i grieved a little.

Spent the next half of the day unpacking all the stuff at my place. I simply have no idea where and what to begin with. *Headache.

2010-09-17T22:12:00.001-07:00

I didnt really wanna do a blog entry in the middle of the night but due to fact that i slept at 7pm earlier on, sleep isnt on my dictionary at the moment.

Let me just simply narrate my life the past few days. Why am i having the feeling that my family is celebrating my departure? They were literally blasting loud music at home when we could have hugged together and cry LOL. A day before i left, my mum insisted i drove the family up to farmart for a feast aka farewell dinner. After which, my brother took over the wheel and brought us to Mustafa Centre at Little India in search for my itouch. Guess what, i found the old Itouch but not the latest one ;0

I guess Charlene played a big role in stimulating my tears glands. She kept emphasizing on the activities we had done together in the past - nobody gonna cook baked rice for her, miss the way i pinched her cheek and sing stupid songs with her etc etc etc. Though i didnt make full use of the holidays doing internship, but the 3mths of bonding with family and friends were really meaningful to me. ;D

The moment my mum asked for the reason behind my gloomy face made me burst out crying. It's just... removing a piece of flesh out of me. As she have analyzed - perhaps i'm just too used to living in my comfort zone here in SG.
Surprisingly out of love for her daughter, my mum suggested to me 2 alternatives, either i come home during Dec or transfer back to local university. I'll consider the former but definitely not the latter. Sometimes we learn things the hard way, but at the end of the day, it might be worth the pain.

Anyway, i cried when i entered the departure hall. Yes kind of funny to wail in the 2nd yr and not the 1st. Suddenly, there's so many things i've yet to do in SG. As you bade goodbye to your comfort zone, there you see many hurdles/challenges waving their hands at you. WHAT A CRAP honestly. As compared to the 1st flight heading Dubai, the 2nd one seems relatively longer. I dun rem myself opting for a 3 seats row so i suffered a mild shock to realize that on my 2nd flight. Anyway the English couple next to me was exceptionally nice even when i got out of my seat thrice during the journey. There's for once i told myself to get an aisle seat next time. (Say only lol.) Then again, there were 2 little kids seated right behind me making a big fuss out of nothing every now and then. Personally, i feel pretty okay since my emotions is more or less nullified from the departure. In fact, it's extremely heartwarming to see that they have their parents traveling side by side with them to another part of the world. Aww.
Managed to caught 2 movies - Backup plan and Iron man 2! LOL, see i told you - HSL gets very very very bored on flight.

As i laid comfortable in Didi's place, i cant help but to pity those freshers. I must have sound like a bitch now LOL! Basically, there are various reasons why i said that. Firstly, you have an idea how the custom officers are gonna question you. In fact, with my student card as prove of identification, they do not spend time interrogating me like a criminal. As a year 2 bright student (haha), you are aware of all the operational procedures. Secondly, i get to choose the mode of transport back to hostel and not rely on the school services to pick me up etc. No no, i aint sure if i'm still on my right mind adapting to my environment while worrying about my baggage and still face the pressure mixing around with freshers on the bus. Anyway this time round, special thanks to the Gunawan couple for picking me up at the airport. :D

Cool breeze welcomed me as i walked out of the airport. Learning from past experience, i wore a few layers this time round. Never belittle the weather of MCR, it can be quite sucky at times, or rather everytime. Wearing 2 pieces is just never enough. NEVER.
While at the accomodation office...
Carolyn: Hey you got the new block, everything's new inside!
Me: Sure not, dun give me false hope leh.
Carolyn: yeah it's but then again how fun it gonna be depends on flatmates as well
I've met my 1st flatmate out of 3 and she seems pleasant, now it's up to God to decide my fate. Oh please!
The 1st situation of the day was finding my key. Apparently i dropped my one and only key at my kitchen and the 3 of us went around frantically searching for it. LOL. Immediately at my room, i set up the internet connection at the fastest speed since communicating with the outside world is of paramount importance to me.
Oh the situation didnt end immediately. After i managed to find my 1st key, Carolyn came with the extra key requested from the reception. Then somehow somewhat, we lost this key. LOL the search continues. When both keys were discovered, i forgot where i placed my hostel swipe card. HAHAHAHAHAHA

Went to the bank and then a restaurant for lunch before setting off to Didi's place. It's great to have the 4 of us under the same roof again! Supposedly, my intention of the day was to pick up my stuff but ended up dozing off at their cozy leather sofa. The guys were really sweet to set up the heater and get the blanket for me. Dunno it's a prank or really sincere thoughts, Didi left a note on the table with a cup noodles and a mug stating 'Help yourself, dun be shy'. Sounds nice right? Check out the flavor of the noodles before you say anithing. LOL beef.

I was up at 5am, now after 2.5hrs, i am getting sleepy. Stop the jetlag please.

2010-09-16T05:09:00.000-07:00

I really have no wish to influence any of my family member but suppressing my feelings has failed terribly and i finally exploded into tears.

Heart-wrenching.

I will do a proper entry when i'm emotionally stable.

2010-09-14T00:56:00.001-07:00

Tuesday
My hairdresser scratched my neck while dealing with my hair. Just for the moment it looks like lovebite. :S

I tried lookin for my itouch again but sadly to no avail. That's it, i sense a boring flight. I dunno why but i find it real hard to leave this time round. The only time when i couldnt visualize my future was being pushed into the operation theatre. And for now, believe it or not, i am feeling the same.

There's a sharp pain that poke forcefully into my lung the whole of today. -.- Nevertheless, i met up with Xueling for dinner. She shall be the last friend i gonna hang out with for this summer break and after which, my mum is my world ;)
To worsen my situation after consuming a pill, the brakes and such in the crazy jam almost made me vomited.

HXL changed my perception on relationship issues tonight. In truth, i already knew such prob exists but to fully acknowledge it and make a change isnt so easy. With no entertainment tools on hand, i was forced to think about such related issues on the long bus journey back home.

Oh oh oh, thanks to Kristine kow, i am so addicted to Katy Perry 'Teenage Dream'. The MTV though consist of only photo slideshow was awesome enough to keep me watching constantly. All the shots are seriously good with both the leads exuding a genuine expression of feelings.
LOL dunno if it sounds like a joke but that does turn me on and i feel like falling in love.

My heart stops, when you look at me
Just one touch, now baby I believe

I finally found you, my missing puzzle piece
I'm complete

I might get your heart racing in my skin-tight jeans
Be your teenage dream tonight

Let you put your hands on me in my skin-tight jeans
Be your teenage dream tonight

Monday
After a long day of runnin errands, i headed town for a get together with Jasmine Lin and Adi. I'm afraid Kristine might keep on tagging me with Manhattan Fish Market's food so this time round i told myself to eat sick of such food and not fall into temptations over at UK. LOL!

We decided to drown our sorrow at Giraffe after dinner. Ok UK isnt so bad, i miss alcohol la. The highlight was the makeout session right opposite our table. LOL eh some people cant control their emotions and desires very well. Anyway, i dun mind, feel free to show it publicly. HAHAHAH.

I am not verbally strong and unsure if you even read this entry, but this part shall be dedicated to you, Jas L. It takes tremendous courage to embark on an overseas study mission for a few years. The beginning is often hard to bear but as time goes by, your life might get sweeter. Having experienced such torment before, i totally could understand how you feel. No doubt Manchester and Warwick are separated by hundreds of kilometers, but should you need any assistance, give me a call or smting, i would still try to head down asap. (That includes crying together though i really wish we wont LOL)
Cheers to a better future, and we can do it ;)
*自立,自信,自强*

2010-09-12T08:07:00.000-07:00

Yesterday's tiredness totally drained away half of today. It's so unlike of me to waste my time having naps, but today i did it. Phew.
Got pricked by the thorns when i tried plucking the whole mimosa for my niece with the intention of planting it in our little garden. -.-

I'm already trying my very best to effectively allocate time for these 2 days' meetups. Everyone just has the habit of initiating meetups when my departure time approaches. Last year was like this, now the same old thing happens again. People whom i was supposed and wanted to meet up didnt get the chance to, simply bcoz... i might be biased. They arent THAT close to me as compared to my buddies but still they are very nice people to hang out with.

So let's talk about the logic of grouping friends here. The reason why i did it both consciously and unconsciously was due to my belief that... everyone has limited time and we cant possibly give up time for all our friends. That often relates to scarcity in which markets solve it by pricing those goods. Maybe as a result of such a mindset, very often i find myself procrastinating to meet up certain friends. Or should i say, they aren't the priority?
Anyway, it's just SOMETIMES. And, i know guys wont really mind hor?
Theory dun always follow, occasionally i do find myself pondering over the definition of 'good friend'. Feelings at that point of time might matter more than just a simple category.
Anyway deepest apologies to those whom i didnt manage to hang out with during this summer vacation. Sorry.

Hey now, hey now, the dream is over~
Hey now, hey now, when the world comes in~

2010-09-11T09:20:00.000-07:00

Saturday
Thanks to Melissa T, Kristine K, Chenghui and the guys, i had an enjoyable day out. For a start, i met up with TFL for Haw Par Villa. Everyone was very discouraging about the trip, criticizing about boredom there. If you know me well, i am a person with very unique passion. Understanding Chinese folklore, legends, history is a great interest of mine.
The 10 courts of hell deeply fascinate me with gruesome depiction of hell in Chinese mythology. The whole passage wasnt eerie but with those stupid remarks we made upon entry, it indeed scares us a little.

Ah ha a 'water situation' occurred while we were about to exit HPV. I dunno how my bottle managed to be opened (though i swear i did lock it), it actually spilled over the whole of TFL's bag causing great damage to her Polaroid and my digital cam. The only fortunate thing was - having my dslr hung at my neck. Is it a blessing in disguise to have the flaming sun for us to dry the bag?

Love HPV! If you invite me to go again, i would def do so :) Perhaps someone ought to film 'Night at the Musuem 3' in SG, with HPV as the focus. LOL!
Anyway just for your info, SPI.com has featured a few investigations on HPV, but i dun recommend for faint hearted to read.

Caught up with Kristine at Marina Barrage after being late for an hour. While all the visitors are out in the sun flying their kites or enjoying a nice sunbath, this tai tai was rejoicing in the cafe with a cold beverage. :D

Rushed down to meet up with the NS chaps - Chenghui, Bo Han and Huat Jin. Dinner was at Fish Mahantthan Market. ^_^
Guess what, Cheng hui treated us the eye-popping 7th heaven! Hate to say, i'm getting of Hagen Daz now, LOL!!!

2010-09-10T09:45:00.000-07:00

Friday
Just when i decided to get the new itouch, it ran out of stock. Nokia X5 does in certain ways attracts me but for the time being, i prefer to stick to my old phone.

Upon making the decision for another impromptu visit to my grandma's house, my brother gave us a lift there before heading for his regular badminton fun. On the way there, we had a little of debate session on the car. I dunno why but we came across the topic on 'getting a small car'. For your info, occasionally i brought up my intention of getting a small car (those without a boot) to my mum. And to my misfortune, my mum hates her children driving small ones. It's nothing related to reflecting wealthiness or other materialistic elements but she felt that small car lacks of security. Firstly, overtaking is hard since the the engine could hardly support the power needed. Secondly, should any accidents happen, the driver wont have any protection due to the absence of boot. Frankly speaking, i was slightly dejected when they did not approve on getting it. (No, i am not getting it too soon)

Spent the next few hours at grandma's hse rotting. After which, my brother came to fetch us to farmart for supper. I gave a 8/10 for its food - totally mind blowing.

Thursday
Went Great World City with my family for lunch. Then it's shopping at Chinatown again. LOL.
While packing my luggage today, i discovered my eticket summary. Guess what, i actually misread my flight details for the upcoming one! Angry mother.

Come to think of it, i did sense something wrong when the flight was in the afternoon. Night flight is more favored because the noon wont be wasted and i get to have Charlene to send me off.

2010-09-08T08:43:00.000-07:00

I better stop shopping, my baggage cannot take it anymore.
JE - Teck whye - JP was the car routes for today. Driving in rainy weather is irritating and especially so when you meet motorcyclists who drove in the middle.

Just before i could get a nap, my bro decided to bring us around - off to queensway shopping centre before hitting Chinatown. :)

A good friend of mine came up with this interesting friendship theory based on how he sees my friendship with others. He felt that i have this certain group of people whom i consider as good friends. And that, there's always 1 special person amongst them. According to him, i am just like the king who appoints the queen and make the rest concubines. For those who are not in the circle are typical palace maids. That goes to say, i dun rank my friends bcoz they are of equal status (concubine right). LOL
All these sound funny but they are true to a large extent. Now the question is, do i change queen often?

Should i get an itouch or a wide angle lens? Itouch offers me entertainment but when you already have a pretty good mp3 would you still want such device? PSP or nintendo DS as gaming gadgets are simply too distracting if it were to be placed on my table. Wide angle lens might be a better investment since i always wanted to capture picture of deeper depth.

2010-09-06T19:42:00.000-07:00

Hey hello, today is the end of 7th month! That means i still stand a chance to visit Haw Par Villa right???

I love my hp a lot though it disappoints me frequently. Just like any other day, it fails to notify me of incoming msges and as a result, everyone received awfully late replies. If i dun reply, please call me. Smart phones are getting very popular nowadays that it dominated 3/4 of starhub display panels. I need a new hp asap but none appeals me. There's one pretty stylish phone but it takes 2 wks to arrive. Ok i will miss it for sure.
With no other choices, i wanted to settle down on iphone or blackberry. Unfortunately subscribing the data plan locally and bringing it overseas is not worth it. Either way they charge an exorbitant price for the service.

Charlene almost got lost and her face went white when she was out with us today. LOL! Oh yeah I finally received the keys from my mum (21st bdae) and it's not 1 but 2!
At the same time, I bought a really nice bdae present for a gd friend; practical and rich in meaning. ;) Normally if they dun list down their desired gift, i would analyze myself. HAHAHA

My sis in law specially came to bid me farewell since she would be back in Indonesia for her well deserved vacation. This sudden act of hers startled me a little. LOL.

I am trying to load in more songs for my mp3 player because those old songs remind me of the mental torment i had in MCR. Can you believe i could rem the sequence for the hundreds of songs in my player? I use it whenever and wherever i want then.
Not as if i'm going to club on the flight but listening to songs with faster beat makes me happier ;) When i cant change my environment, i change myself.
It's dead boring traveling alone. -.-

Am i a very biased friend?

2010-09-05T18:44:00.001-07:00

Monday
I went to IMM yesterday night in search for a webcam and external harddisk. The cam is for my mum who needs to see how i'm wasting my life in UK via skype. The latter will serve as a backup for those photos and files in my old harddisk. They are too precious to be risked in only 1 harddisk that might fail or get stolen anytime.

At the playground, it's my mum's N attempt to brainwash me and inculcate the right mindset before i set off to UK.
Okay.

I will play ard with my DSLR before heading to IMM later for a walk.

2010-09-04T19:08:00.000-07:00

Sunday
I forgot to mention about the new lavender plant yesterday. On first impression, it doesnt look like one, though it has purple flowers. Halfheartedly, i bought it home because of my love for purple. What a pity not many appreciate this lovely color.
According to a website, purple a mysterious color, symbolizes royalty and is associated with both nobility and spirituality. Due to the fact that purple is derived from the combination of strong warm and strong cool color, it has both warm and cool properties. For that, it's very true.
Ah the plant is recognized to be lavender since the internet claims that there are hundreds types around.

After breakfast this morning, i brought Charlene to aunt's house. I wonder what led to her change of view when she kept emphasizing about touring Europe during my school days. The chat was pretty long and i selectively picked up a few words that are worth remembering. I am having my golden period now and to tour Europe is lifetime opportunity.
I sense regrets here and there. ;(

Left for NTU when she had to search for a key bundle there. Nothing much to do over there so i stayed in the lab and watched Charlene play with her fb games.

2010-09-04T02:00:00.000-07:00

Saturday
Before dawn today, I woke up in desolation. Hate to say, i detest the fact that my flight is in a wk plus time. Most probably this feeling arises from reiterating all those bad memories to my mum. The more she encourages me to anticipate the challenges there, the greater is my sorrows. Oh well at least that's better than her crying to have me stay on. (FYI, my mum will never go to that extent) She said crying for me based on this reason is a waste of effort. SAD RIGHT. LOL ok so she shall see me weep like no tomorrow in Changi.
To worsen my condition this morning, the previous entry triggers me to cogitate about some stuff.

Stalkers (those who irritates) ought to know there is a thin line between stupidity and perseverance. They can come up to initiate something with you and when rejection is faced, they scold you. Sorry, i am like a block of wood.

Visited my auntie who is doing business near West Coast Plaza.
I really feel upset about leaving, more than how i felt last year.

2010-09-03T00:46:00.000-07:00

Friday
Having experienced before that appointment at NUH doesn't seem to work, I purposely arrived 45minutes late. Still, i had to wait for another hour to be called in. Okay the wait is worthy: the doctor is very pretty LOL!
I complained about the stuffiness in my chest area and she said that taking such antibiotic will cause fire in the heart if water consumption isn't sufficient. LOL anyway the good news is, it might be the last course of medication. Knowing i am heading back UK soon, my doctor generously gave me another 4 mths of medicine which is like hundreds more pills to chew. NICE.
On my way back, i grieved at the thought of leaving SG.

I cancelled a badminton game with my neighbour, a sec sch sch mate because of exhaustion. Sorry! Insomnia has bugged me for a few wks and this afternoon i was so dead beat that I actually dozed off on the sofa while talkin to my niece. What was she saying huh?

My 2nd brother gave me a bottle of Tommy Hilfiger fragrance. :)

Thursday
On a scorching hot day like yesterday, i went Botanic garden with Jasmine Lin. The bus driver gave me a feeling that driving slow is equivalent to safety. Ok, that's partly an excuse, the reason being late is i couldn't find my shoe. :S

Botanic garden is as lovely as ever, especially with the Orchid garden. Once a while out in the sun and embrace the mother nature aids to revitalize our spirits and rejuvenate the mind. As compared to wandering around aimlessly in the hustle and bustle town, that's a better choice for more philosophical people like us. HAHA

Had dinner at Sushi Tei, Vivo before getting to RWS. I misread a msg and thought that USS will be opened to the general public with no interest in taking the rides on all week days. What a failure. Thankfully the night scenery in Sentosa made up for our loss, it's so much more captivating than during the day!

Spent the night on a block of rock chatting with Jas L because my shoes bite me. You have no idea how much i enjoyed such moment, instantly i was reminded of my childhood where my cousins and brothers would play crazily at the farm. While the adults slogged hard with farming and trading, the 5 of us would climb the trees and pluck nuts, play with water sprinklers, ride on the trucks, search for kittens or simply exploring.
At that point of time, i was very much in love with my 2nd brother. Back then, i said i wanted to marry guys who are similar to him LOL! He got the damn courage to do dangerous things like climbin up some unknown piles (with dangers of snakes lurking ard) to 'steal' kittens and get chased by the cat. I guess the vivid scar mark on his hand will remind him of his boldness to operate the machinery on his own.

I cant rem exactly if there were any preferential treatment (since i was the only girl) but the 4 of them were very protective of me. At least sometimes they bothered to find boots with no centipedes for me! LOL but they dun wait. -.-
Life really rocks then. :D

Anyway back to story, tonight's conversation set me musing over my life philosophy. I admit that there's a change of values during the 9mth out in MCR. I experienced much and i suffered a lot. Expectation was the culprit - i am not even aiming for perfect story but merely a predictable one. As you could tell, things didnt turn out the way it ought to. I often pondered over 'limits'. How sure am i that trying my best at my expense will reap greater good in the future? How sure am i that what i object now might turn out to be my priority in the future? No doubt i always preach about having faith but honestly i still fear that one day my inner soul will scream out: hey this isnt what i want.

Friendship wise, i am thankful that i always retrieve what i lost (or maybe some intrinsic value has disappeared). People change, good or bad i am in no position to say. We've not yet heard about their side of story and it's meaningless to draw your own conclusion. Is the person only my friend because of his/her original values? For instance, you could say: I like this friend because she is outspoken. That means one day if she ever changed completely opposite, you would lost a friend? Or would you hold on for the fact that she was once a good friend of mine?
Negative thoughts invade my mind whenever i didnt take chocolate (LOL). Therefore the only mindset i held back then was: I want to go back SG and hear their story. Nobody will be heartless to you for no reason, especially your friend.

You cant lose what you never had.
Sometimes i dun say, but that doesnt mean i dun care.

2010-08-31T05:36:00.000-07:00

Exhausted is the best word to describe my current state of mind. HSL, you need some exercise.

While tearing off the car coupon, i suddenly gained enlightenment. It dawned on me that i've not been doing it the right way. If you are aware, the denomination of the coupons comes in 0.5, 1 dollars or 2 dollars. 50cents is usually for half an hour duration. Guess what, i actually tore 2 of such coupons at the same hour without interval. That means all along lady luck is on my side! (No parking offence)
Just like today, we overshot by half an hour more. The parking warden was only steps away from the place i drove off a few seconds ago. LOL

I want to play tennis.

2010-08-30T04:21:00.000-07:00

Last minute arranged meetup with Melissa Tan to run some errand at Raffles City. No one was late :P
We were served by this cheeky uncle who kept smiling at us. By chance, i happened to see him winking at TFL and then witnessing her turned red. From her expression, I know TFL enjoys it very much. HAHAHA!

Developing a sudden urge to eat chocolate, we strolled over to Raffles City. The sales lady at Cocoa Tree repeatedly told me about my faulty credit card. There's a joke because my card never fails. Her countless try to clean my card wasn't as useful as a wipe from me.
Anyway, i thank TFL for holding her promise to get my mum a piece of choco though i seriously treated it as a casual comment made.

Bought a few fruit tarts for my mum lalalala~

Just when i wanted to turn in early for the night, my family decided to enjoy night life. In our terms, it means doing shopping and having supper (not the manchester kind of clubbing). We are a family of DIY; my sis-in-law who opted to make mooncakes now purchased hundreds over of ingredients and i just bought snap bean seeds for my garden. ^^

Why snap bean, you might ask. LOL because it states: especially suited to hot weather and humid condition, easy to grow! I was actually choosing between lady finger or snap bean but the latter packet description wasnt convincing enough. ( HAHA i must spot those key words.)
Oh well, i trust my mum to tend it well after i left. :)

2010-08-29T05:34:00.000-07:00

Last night i had supper with my mum at a playground. The feeling is so carefree.
Today we went shopping in Orchard. It's tiring but godly.
I'm mummy's girl :)

For the first time in this 3 mth holidays, i do not mind heading back Manchester. The reason is the same as why i left SG last year - it's just suffocating to be trapped in a small island. I am a small girl with big dreams, LOL! Set me free and i''ll come back when the time is ripe ;)

Having screwed up my created Sim, Randall, for allowing it to have 5 kids and totally ruined their growth stages, i started up with another Sim, Amcer Han. He took on the surname of Han Geng. LOL! I seek adventures in games, so after attaining the top level for his government career as an international spy, i switched him to be in the music industry.

I'm sooooo in love with my bitter gourds.

2010-08-27T22:35:00.000-07:00

I've lost another thing to do at home after YOG was brought to an end. You have no idea how much of an enthu YOG fan i am, or rather how much time i've on hand to kill. Anyway it's beneficial for me if i were to watch the Olympics games in London 2012. By then, these youth athlete will most probably meet there for the real competition and i would be aware of the athletes and rules of games.

Clarence Chew, SG representative for table tennis caught my eyes because of his resemblance with a pri school mate of mine. I believe he will go far with his calibre.
I love Koki Niwa's fast reflexivity. Just for your info, he is the champion for table tennis. ^_^ The mixed team gold medal match between Japan and Korea was so stiff that the diff between the final points were only 2 or 3. To lose by a such a margin is truly a regret and for people who cannot take losing easily might get very traumatized by it. Oh well, luck comes into play sometimes.

My mum couldnt believe how crazy i was over YOG. Apparently i watched almost every single match live on tv across a range of sports, mainly swimming, table tennis, taekwondo and gymnastic.

Someone left me an offline msg this morning which touched me a little. HAHA what crap but it's funny la

With my total dedication, my bitter gourd plant has bore more fruits! :)
Decided to add eggplant and chili to my garden :D

2010-08-27T06:50:00.000-07:00

I was caught in this heavy traffic jam tonight. The bus had little minimal movement, after 25minutes it was still trapped in the same road. The authority should seriously consider expanding the num of lanes and do something about the damn jam. I wonder what on earth was on my mind when I alighted 1 stop earlier for my 1st bus and 1 stop later for the next. 50minutes late for the meetup.
Ok no more Holland Village for the moment.

Though the meetup was only for 2 hours and it took up plenty of my time to get there and back, i felt that it's still worth the effort. There's what keeps friendship going isnt it? Furthermore, this sec sch clique outing always come once in a blue moon due to our tight schedule and conflicting timetables with each other.
I dont ever want us to let go of each other. Maybe our paths will go in separate directions, but that won't change the bond we share and what's in our hearts.

This week rounds up the last August week for me. With sep approaching, i've to do the essential preparations before my flight. -.- Ok never mind, it's loads of crap but better be well packed than go there and regret big time.
My only regret is having to miss out Haw Par Villa, a place that i wish to revisit this summer. Now that Seventh month is here, i doubt it's wise to visit that place.

2010-08-24T08:21:00.000-07:00

I am done with servicing my bike at $2. LOL! Riding a bicycle gives me more stress than driving a car. The grip was tightly held to the point it aches so much after the fun.

Currently on my agenda now is to remove those trash in my harddisk.

2010-08-23T09:15:00.000-07:00

Headed Indo Embassy and Orchard with family this afternoon. Somewhere near to the evening, Tricia came to join me for shopping spree. This is the 1st time i splurged hundreds on cosmetics. LOL
At night, we sat down in FISH restaurant for dinner with Linda and Kelvin. Followed up, we had dessert at a shop that sells fruit tarts. To think we actually spend time choosing the flavor and to hear from the waitress that only 4 types are left.

Woah i feel so proud to accompany them on the same bus for around 1.30hrs. Cherishing moments together is important for the fact that we wont know when would be the next meet up. Most probably the next time we gonna meet would be a year + - considering that i am staying in UK for my friends' graduation ceremony.
Today happens to be last day out with Tricia Tay :( A mist of sadness clouded my mind during the departure time.

Haven't i got used to departure?

2010-08-22T07:41:00.000-07:00

Saturday
My mum wanted to get me a key pendant for my post- 21st birthday present, but sadly to no avail. I cant seem to find one that pleases me, though the salesperson was really good with words - 'This design is inspired by Tiffancy & Co', doesnt it sound much better than 'We have copied from'? HAHAHA
Day spent at Bugis is enjoyable :)
With so many birthday's round the corner, i sighed at the thought of ratiocinating what to get.

Jiahao together with Carus, Casper and Jiang Hao came to pick me up for supper. For a change, we've Jiahao as driver tonight. I swear that the thought of not getting back home safe;y did crossed my mind; never never never have i met such a reckless driver.
I wouldnt even say he has no patience at all, because to be honest, he doesnt even like any vehicle to be in front of him. From lane 1 (the lane used for fast moving vehicles/cutting lanes) , he cut all the way to lane 3 in order to overtake the vehice at lane 1 and after which, he cut all the way back into 3 again.

Out of... kindness, we reminded him to check mirror before cutting. The moment when i sensed danger was when he cut lane together with a vehicle near us.
Can you imagine a car of 1.5 CC doing this at the speed of 100+km/hr? LOL. We almost hit the car infront at AMK ave 1 if not for Carus to bark at him.

Perhaps we shouldnt have chose Chomp Chomp to dine at because Serangoon area usually is very crowded and with cars parked along both sides of the road. I hope he was using his judgment and not relying on luck when he can pass each vehicle with a 5cm distance gap.

While getting down the slope, i suspect he accelerated because it was impossible to be that near to the vehicle in front.
Carus: Are we a little too near to the car in front? Eh brake leh.
JH: Carus! I know what i am doing la.
Me: Yeah, we are a little too near to the car.
Carus: If the car in front were to do a E-brake, that's it for us leh.
JH: Dont worry, my car has air bags.
Me: (Totally speechless)

I really wanted to kill Carus for suggesting to cut lane. There were a few incidents when we almost collide.
I might sound furious but seriously i was just in the state of shock. Thank him for the ride home and hope that he can be safer. :)

Sunday
Had a swim at BB complex and by chance bumped into a few LG friends and my coach. I thought it was clear enough to all about my summer vacation here. How come everyone is still asking?

I forgot my scheduled meetups. A lot of dates sound familiar but i cant seem to recall.
Most significantly of all is 9/11. I know there are a few things on this date, can someone remind me?

2010-08-19T22:11:00.000-07:00

I've been running late for all meetups recently. On Tuesday, Kristine who reached early had to wait more than 25 minutes for me. On Wednesday, Kwee Gek messaged me to walk around first since she would be late. I've the urge to forward back the message to her when i know perfectly who's going to be dead late.
Yesterday, the SG clique met in UK waited 1 hour for me. (But they were already in the restaurant eating :P) To appease everyone, I decided for an ice cream treat.
LOL always late but worth the wait!

Yesterday's dinner was fried rice, today i am gonna cook Laksa. Woohoo!
I spent the afternoon clearing unnecessary photos out of my harddisk. Some memories are not worth holding on to so it's not worth any storage.

Till now, i still cant figure out why good men die early. I always feel that the world would be a lot more beautiful if there's no accidents. Neither will anyone die with regrets nor will there be eternal torment of absence/memory plague for the surviving kins.
Who has the greatest regrets?
A: Someone who wants to execute the task but have no ability
B: Someone with ability but for some reason did not execute the task

Ok, i am very tired today.

2010-08-15T04:45:00.000-07:00

Monday
My mum suddenly called to propose the idea of visiting my maternal grandma. What an impromptu arrangement but I perfectly understand what's filial piety so it was absolutely fine for me. :)

Anyway while heading to Bukit Panjang Plaza, we witnessed this wicked van driver's attempt to make someone fail her driving practical. Firstly, he tailgated her (and damn it was really close) up the slope. In order to do a U turn infront, the girl tried to get into the right lane early. Right after she cut into the empty lane, the van followed suit. If the examiner were to take a second slower to observe that, it will appear that the girl was making a abrupt cut. After which, that sickening van moved back into the original lane that he came from. Wow super good game for the girl. Just down on her luck to choose such a timing and meet this situation. If my vehicle was right behind her, then it's a different story la :D

Bumped into Juraimee, Loo and their LG mates!
Nothing much in grandma's house; i read my iweekly and the rest start to reminisce about the past. With nothing better to do next, i brought them over to my godmother's place for fun.

I made cheese baked pasta for my family. :D

Tuesday
Had a great dimsum dinner with Kristine Kow at JP tonight. ^_^
I enjoy taking video in her car LOL!

The good news is today's dental checkup is fine and the bad one is i need to remove my wisdom tooth soon. -.- There's little time allocated for tooth extraction because my flight has been more or less confirmed. With shorter than a mth to go, i should cry with Tricia who's leaving next week.

Randomly, i had a video call with Didi & Carolyn. They want me to die with envy here LOL.

2010-08-15T03:46:00.000-07:00

Saturday
After dinner with my mum, i headed right out for supper with Carus, Jiahao & Yingjing. LOL i usually wont turn down anywhere with good food and company. Our 1st task was to pick up YJ & JH at Dempsey road. I thought it was great fun exploring unfamiliar routes with the help of GPS and little guessing on our side (maybe bcoz i wasnt driving HAHAHA)

Hanged out at Dempsey for a little while before YJ finally knocked off from work. She was very proud for selling 2 bottles of Johnnie Walker Gold Label in 2 days. Honestly it might appear nonsensical to you, but that is actually an achievement for any alcohol promoter.
During the journey to Bedok, we've loads of fun on the car. My impression of JH changed instantly when he wind down the window and screamed at the guy who did not abide the traffic rules.
Me: Wow you gt the guts.
JH: Oh scare what, he cant run after you.
Us: Ppl will write down your car plate duh
JH: Yeah i know, bt it's not my car HAHAHAHAH
Carus: -.-

LOL from the way he gave comments on driving made me a little wary of his driving skills. Next time fret not when someone honked you on the road, most probably it's some guys who've nth to do.

Supper was pretty enjoyable with them even with those historical old teasings. Waa whatever you did in the past, people can still remember till now. -.-
Owning to the heavy meal, the trip back to the West appears very long. If i were Carus, i would still be a safe driver but driving at more than 100km/hr. In order to stop us from sleeping, JH brought out alot of rac**t jokes. LOL

Spent 40min in the middle of the night to be updated abt some juiciest gossips in JWSC. By the time i reached home, it was already 3.30am?
Good night :D

2010-08-13T05:54:00.000-07:00

Out of boredom and piqued by curiosity, i went to search for videos on Hitler. There has been many research that produced different version of his whereabouts after the end of WW2. Based on his acquaintances' account, Hitler committed suicide with his wife in the bunker at Berlin. Recent research revealed that the skull found at the site belongs to a female. Stalin back then suggested that his old nemesis was alive and with certain speculation and analysis, scientists suspected that Hitler had escaped to Argentina.
I wonder how credible those accounts are when it was said that Hitler has been spotted with his wife and 2 kids.

Actually i used to think he had faked death because it's impossible for such ambitious leader to give up that easily. Then come to think of it, what''s the point of staying on earth when he lost everything (the whole nation that he has built from scratch)? Given his character, would he fancy to be under the thumb of his enemies?
This is a very sensitive topic but i admire Hitler's vision and bravery. I dare not say he's evil but he (could have been)/(was)/(is) a good leader.

I still like Han Geng. LOL!
Check him out at the Super Junior M - Super Girl.

2010-08-12T08:32:00.000-07:00

LOL it was until today i realize my interest for gardening. My mum will seriously kill me if i decided for a change of course in UK. I found myself looking forward to watering my plants everyday. My aim is to prevent burnt leaves and holes (from the damn caterpillars) because that will make my heart has holes also. LOL

Having just bought a new luxurious bungalow for my Sim, i felt extremely contented tonight. My created Sim, Randall has reached the career stage of an athlete superstar! This means he gets to sign autographs for other sims and earn a profits for it. On top of this, i've added in traits such as flirty, hopeless romantic and good kisser to make him popular with the girls. Now what's left for him should be finding the right girl to settle down with.

LOL to achieve maximum pleasure from this game, i got a little psychotic with the manipulation of the sim. Randall has a girlfriend and around 8 girls with whom he has romantic interest with. To test out what possible reactions he could have, occasionally i've to stage the scene for which there could be jealousy etc. For now, the aging mode is turned off because Randall is at his peak regardless career or relationship. Since in real life there's no perfect ending, i thought having 1 in virtual world is good. Randall will only aged after he has shares in most firms and his kids are growing well. AND my wish in real life continues into the game - Randall shall have twins or triplets! (The lifetime happiness points collected allows me to purchase 'fertility boost')
HA HA HA ok i can sleep blissfully tonight.

On a serious note, they ought to have the singapore version of the sim 3. Hiring me is bound to be the best thing that can ever happen to their company. HAHAHAHA!
It's fun to have seventh month ghost festival where they see the release of spirits into the neighbourhood, having flood as natural occurrence and other significant events or structures incorporated into the game.

The concluding question is: why am i taking Economics?
LOL, i am kidding.

2010-08-11T01:39:00.001-07:00

I'm still bothered about the flight change.

Made my whole family cheese baked rice tonight for dinner. HA HA HA i make a good housewife.

I felt a little uneasy for no cause tonight. Just what's wrong?

2010-08-09T22:00:00.001-07:00

Tuesday
With a charge of 75pounds, Emirates is giving me a choice for my flight change but the stopover is horrendously long. My original scheduled flight is a week earlier before school term starts and the idea of returning back earlier either for vacation or idle really does not appeal to me. No doubt that i believe life is definitely getting better in year 2 but I cant bear to leave home for another 9months or even more.
I am disappointed with you la, Emirates. Should I change or not?

Day is well spent travelling to Supreme Court, Ministry of Foreign Affairs and Queensway Shopping Centre. I paid attention to all the roads my brother took, in case one day i might need to get there alone without a GPS or map. LOL.
Oh ya, peninsula plaza serves affordable and delicious Myanmar food! Now i see why losing weight is impossible in SG.

At Alexandra road, we witnessed this ugly car accident of which one of the cars spin 360 degree. The car plate appeared to show that it's an envoy's vehicle. Forunately no one is injured if not SG gonna hit the headline of some countries' newspapers. (I care about SG okay, hahah)

2010-08-09T07:45:00.000-07:00

Monday
NDP 2010 was such a life threatening moment for my niece's fighting fish. When the bright lights flashed across the screen, it suddenly jumped out of its tank to land on the table top. Oh wow, just like its owner, this fish is equally patriotic.

This year's performance was lacking in depth and coordination among the performers were bad. Sometimes it's hard to mark out what they are trying to shape out. Anyway, happy national day! No matter where i am, Singapore is always my home. :)

I seriously love the youtube video 'Super Junior Premium Live in Japan 2009 - Sorry Sorry'. Oh well, this remix is fantastic in a way that everyone was able to bring out the essence of the dance and apart from the original mtv parts, many value added interactions were added in. Maybe because it was live show which could be why on the whole it was better than the mtv and all members look exceptional dashing. They have proven that it's possible to be organized and neat in dance moves even with a big group.
LOL actually i like Han Geng.

2010-08-08T07:54:00.000-07:00

My brother's friend invited us to his house for housewarming today. It happens to be near the place where i volunteered in a childcare centre few years back. Time flies, since when am i so helpful? HAHAHA (as always :P)
With interior designer as the owner of the house, it goes without saying how nicely configured is the style of the house. No doubt white symbolizes elegance, i thought for the whole house to be painted white is a little __. LOL.

Nothing much happened except that i realize a few couples with couple look. I recalled watching this bbc video in my IS module that we tend to like people who look like us. Anyway what is worthy of mentioning is the underlying concept of fate here. The owners of the house, a soon-to-be-married couple are actually neighbours in Msia. The guy came over SG for a long period of time and during these years, he has countless suitors. Perhaps it's true to say: If you like the person, set him free. If he comes back, he's yours. There's absolute trust in this relationship when the girl is willing to let the guy soar as far as he wants. At the end of the day, he still goes back to her, as faithful as ever. So sweet

2010-08-08T07:15:00.000-07:00

Friday
After the months of discussing about our eventual meetup in SG, i finally had a good day out with Tricia Tay. Ha Ha Ha!!!
Yes i do agree with what she said about the bizarre feeling to meet each other face to face now. Don't worry, i am emphasizing here that you are not anywhere plumper and your hair still look good :D

Mayim restaurant serves very uncommon dimsum with an unexpected extreme taste which the both of us have much to say. Ok i admit Manchester's dimsum was being missed at that moment. A trip to Watson with Tricia was very educating since she's cosmetic guru. I never know someone who has vast knowledge on this area and of course, plenty of it.

Shopped around Westmall before heading to Tricia's house to kill time. That was when she left a deeper impression on me as a beauty consultant. OH WOW her new toys awed me. LOL!
I wonder why the tv show was so appealing that afternoon. Tricia repeatedly asked me for next activity while I was so helplessly glued to the tv. I mean even show featuring the grandparent generation having singing competition was so exciting to us. Fortunately she didnt install any karaoke system in her room if not the windows might crack. Sorry leh but i did browse through every piece of your collection! :D
Okay so next, she dropped over my place before we went IMM for dinner. LOL the dialogue session at my house cannot be revealed.

I've a great time at Ichiban Sushi. When was the last time i had so much fun eating like nobody business? Salmon sashimi, Macha mochi, Lobster salad, Chawanmushi, Icecream and yucks, that avocado.
I was trying to give her more wasabi in case she fell asleep in front of me. Having struggled with jet lag before, i could pity her plight now.

Pleasant day :)
I like the idea that hanging out with different friend can give me a different feeling. ^_^
Do you?

2010-08-05T09:21:00.000-07:00

Today i tried playing Sim3! It took me 3 hours just to create a family of 2 before starting to manipulate them. I was very tempted to build a family of GOH with the characters named after those friends of mine in question. (Un)fortunately i am not as psychotic as TFL and i wont have the heart to kill her. :D

Listened through all the Singapore National songs on youtube but still didnt manage to find the one that i heard in RWS yesterday :(
On a brighter note, i'm still thinking about Seventh Heaven ^_^

I did some market research on phones tonight. Nokia E72 and E5 caught my attention.

2010-08-04T09:21:00.000-07:00

A good day out with Melissa Tan at RWS!
Bearing in mind the fact that TFL can never be early, I managed to forecast well enough to meet her right on the dot. HAHAHA

Everything was great except that the pig forgotten to bring along a camera and relying on our hps seemed the best approach. To start off, we strolled the Siloso beach to look for RWS. (Yes, what?!) Basking under the sun on the trams was a good enjoyment. All you need is to bring a pair of sunglasses to admire the scenery under this lovely weather. Anyway, it dawned on me that TFL shouldnt be right next to me when NUS art faculty was having her orientation there. LOL, she has future.
Except for a few money-draining facilities, nothing too drastic has changed since my last visit here.

Adding on to our woes of getting lost, this tourist came over to ask for direction. Okay this is a little kind of embarrassing.
Man: Can i know if this bus goes to the station?
Me: We don't know
Man: Ooh, erm are you guys Singaporeans?
OH no, how can he think that all singaporeans are street smart? Some friends of mine do not even know tanjong beach exists la.
Me: Yes we are.
Man: Is this your 1st time here as well?
Me: Yes 1st time to the NEW sentosa.
Actually i just managed to save enough for the past 20 yrs to get a ticket :P

Having combed through the beaches, we boarded the monorail to waterfront station where the new developments are. We had a good time trying to take pictures on our own. LOL! I promise to head back and take photos with my DSLR until my hands rot. Hear that, Melissa tan? :P
Guess what, we bumped into GJR's ex with a girl and they dont look like siblings. The world is small. Sigh.

I still miss the old monorail. The new monorail has completely replaced the open concept of the old ones that brought us closer to nature. That's the price to pay for efficiency.

Decided not to have Jap food with TFL again again and again so we headed for my fav spanish cuisine at Serenity. I've proven my point that when the restaurant is empty, you will usually get extra services :) The wait for the food was long enough for us to witness a complaining scene. NICE LA.

The highlight of the day was ultimately the Hagen Daz treat from TFL. The main focus wasnt the ice cream actually but the bet itself. It was just a casual bet that i didnt seek to win at all and well, i won not marginally but fully. LOL! I am just good in such things leh :P

As the name suggests, Seventh Heaven is ''paradise on a dish with a choice of seven Häagen-Dazs ice cream flavors, served with fresh fruits drizzled with chocolate sauce''. Not trying to exaggerate but at the moment when the dessert was served, I felt that this was the happiest day of my life, or at least my summer vacation. It is definitely a bittersweet lesson for her, bitter because she has to foot the $42 bill, sweet as she got someone precious like gem. :D
Thanks leh Haaaaaahaaaaaaahaaaaaaaaahaaaaaaa

2010-08-03T08:52:00.000-07:00

I spent the whole afternoon admiring people's art of work online. Finding a template that defines me and conform to the specifications is hard, so halfheartedly i chose this blogskin. A matter of perspective gives a different impression of this template. I feel that the character is a blissful little girl for she is easily contented. You could infer that as long as she has her loved sheep with her, it doesnt matter whether if the sheep is real or not.
Bottomline what i've this skin: I am not bothered about how you think about my expression, this is my blog. :P

My brother bought a new laptop after his macbook got destroyed by a cup of coffee. -.- what?
We've currently broke our own record of having 7 coms/laptops at home.

A friend of mine suggested that i should head back UK and join him for holidays to elsewhere. What a joke i've yet to extend my hols in SG through emirates, would i even shorten it?! He said he's trying to make UK sound fun to me, when in fact he knows it's isnt.
LOL what is, is lor.
Carolyn is flying back to Manchester for her exams soon. I hope she deals with the loneliness better than her exams, seriously. All the best, friend :)

I am a littleeeee regretting about not staying in apartment. MAYBE a bigger space would do me good.

2010-08-02T05:26:00.000-07:00

As a result of trying to chat my niece to sleep, i ended up having insomnia in the middle of the night. That's when i realize the importance of iphone (games). I aint those who follow trend so apple products to me are just simple electronic gadget and not fashion icon. In fact, i am against the idea of having a full touchscreen hp since it leaves me with no back up should it gone wrong.
Not someone who usually change her assets for no reason, when i wanna something, it takes ages for me to set my mind about it. Well, for the fear of regret and the mindset that something better is round the corner. Ok, my mum has big issue with such attitude of mine. LOL
Always late but worth the wait ;)

Oh what a wonderful sight to see little bitter gourds growing in my garden! ^_^ I am currently focusing my effort in tending my papaya shoot, who knows next year it might bear me fruits :D
The season for water apple is over - my fam had a good time eating their fruits of success months back. Come on tree, you can do it, bear me some fruits!

Like a typical babysitter, i brought my niece to and fro school today. This evening by chance, we bumped into her classmates, a pair of twin brothers. I always have a special liking towards twins and it has been my wish to have twin sister since young. We might behave more like siblings with the same look and perhaps with great telepathy and chemistry.
Of course, apparently i dont have such luck so am now hoping to have twins next time. HAHAHA damn wishful thinking.

My day is simple today except for an incident. This young malaysian technician caught my attention just now when he came over to my house and repair the plug. He resembles... i cant remember who.... but a little of Nicholas Tse. I thought it was quite romantic for me to use the torch to lit up the place for him, while he fixed the plug in dark. If he's uncle i wont be using romantic as the word la, but according to my KPO niece, he's a year older than me. In addition, he's a Hakka leh!
I don't know if you describe him as brave or lazy because he changed the plug without switching off the mains. Oh wow, that's niceeee.
LOL, say only la - just cant believe i'll get a little infatuated with guys sometimes.

2010-08-01T07:39:00.001-07:00

4am in the morning, i woke up ill. Just like the song ''I will always love you'', i hope life treats me kind. LOL!

My brother developed yet another fever again today, which obviously means my sleep is disrupted. It's not his fault because nobody wants to get sick (Duh) but i feel a bit pathetic in general for a sick person like me to send another frail one to seek treatment.

Cruised along the highway with my mum and niece in the evening when staying at home seems boring. Oh well, at least driving fast makes me feel energetic once more. Dropped by Alexandra road to visit my aunt who is doing business over there. Come, let's eat. LOL.

I've no single idea what gets me so emotional recently, i actually shed tears whenever melancholic songs are played or when the tv is featuring some tragic family show. My mother reminisced with me the past yesterday night and i found tears swelling in my eyes. Tonight, i laughed at my niece's comment:'' You dont need to go back UK'', while at the same time felt a tinge of sadness. Maybe the medicine that i'm taking is depressant. LOL.
Awww and today is 1st of August 2010.

2010-07-31T01:57:00.000-07:00

In case you are not aware, I am a very low pain tolerant person. Pills or painkiller jab, i definitely choose the latter, not that i love injection a lot but pill takes too long to be fully effective. It is a pleasure to have someone who can understand me to nurse me back to health. When you've no energy to talk anymore, isnt it a lovely thing for him/her to guess your thoughts accurately? :D

Right after my appendicitis operation few years ago, i was moaning in pain when this nurse came over and enquired if i need extra painkiller. Her use of tone on the word 'painkiller' made it sounds so painless to me. Without much thoughts, i nodded.
Guess what, it's a seriously painful JAB on my arm and not through the vein (worse than the wound), to think i thought of pills. BIG REGRET. No better time can i use the phrase ' about to faint' after the shot.

Ironically, my cold sweats is much more than i go for a run. LOL! Today is a painful one. As such for the rest of the day, i shall stay bedridden at home doing some reading/sleeping/playing or generally what a patient should be doing.

Oh ya recently, i found myself new tv entertainment! The Noose 3 over at xinmsn is favored over Taiwan variety show, I guess x3 which used to be a big favourite of mine. It's just a pity the main hosts Jacky wu and Ah ya have officially left the show. Awww
Anyway the Noose is certainly worth watching! The show keeps us updated on Singapore news but discussed in an absurd manner. It uncovers the ugly side of singaporeans based on their attitude towards many issues both internationally and locally. I think credits ought to go to the actors/actress for portraying all roles in a very local style.
LOL!

2010-07-30T00:44:00.000-07:00

It rained like wild dogs and cats this morning. The 1st desire for anyone with a decent mind would be sleep. Unfortunately my splendid morning sleep was destroyed when my brother developed a high fever. I think i would be struck by lightning if i insist to have a hot bath before heading down to get the car.

This moron taxi driver got a little fright when i drove out too fast for him to react well so he stared at me. -.- I saw you and it's not as if i am not going to brake on time, what's the scare? Then another 1 cab driver has the guts to do a sudden U turn 3metre in front of me and on a no-u-turn lane.
Driving after passing is all about being flexible. LOL!

By the time we stopped over Pioneer to have breakfast, my legs totally gone numbed from all the clutching in and brakes. That's the con side of driving a manual car, seriously.
Had a little sleep at home before my mum dragged me out of bed again. I was supposed to drive my little niece to school, visit the temple at Pandan and go get grocery.

Didnt enter the temple with the sculptures of hades since my mum finds it horrifying. Actually, i thought they look cool leh. (Im always very interested in such things)
Anyway, unfilial child and drivers with poor traffic etiquette should watch out. Hahaha

I like the song 'Cant lose what you never had' by Westlife a lot, for yearsss. The lyrics are meaningful and the singers can complement each other marvelously. Today, while watching that MTV, i realized Kian is a pretty boy :D
I was recalled by a bet made with my UK friends - i told them Westlife is from Germany. LOL!

2010-07-29T07:50:00.001-07:00

To start off with the meetup at Ngee Ann Poly with Xueling, i was terribly late. LOL next time please rem to add in another 15min to any time that i've proposed. Punctuality still happens though, but very low chances :D
All good things seem to take place after my batch, right after PSLE and Olevel my primary and secondary school went on PRIME. For now, Canteen 1 is undergoing some renovations to being a learning hub. Oh yea, today marks my first visit to the Makan Place, BELIEVE IT OR NOT! :D Some people obviously looks very familiar, i suspect either they retain a few years or have escaped from SIM.

We spotted an unknown lecture abt to take place when crowds gather near the LT. Apparently, everyone was way too early and it bothers me a little to wait for a lecture that cannot guarantee entertainment. HAHAHA it's against my principle to be earlyyyyyyyyy for class and hence which is why SMU is never suitable for me. Or is every local uni the same? I will change, lol

Nothing much on NP orchard road except that the glasses shop downgraded to merge with Co-op and facilities have upgraded in the library. I think the highlight of the day is mainly those chats with the lecturers, each with a diff conversational focus.

Henry Koh's chat revolves around with IBS and IBSM. Speaking about IBS, i told him i couldnt believe i was the top for it. I cant believe it myself, let alone him right? Since when am i good at selling products or solutions? Hahaha! IBSM on the other hand was exciting because of the politics and not the scenery, LOL!

On the other hand, Ms Wong Yoke Kuan and Ms Sue Tan gave a lot of insights into ACCA and accounting degree which i bet made Xueling feel like killing herself straightaway. They done an awesome job to encourage her to come over UOM and die with me. There's no place like Manchester, and we could stay all night long in our apartment and get crazy together ;)

Decided to wait for Clare Lee to finish her class since she is xueling's benefactor. :P
What a disappointment for her to rem me as the girl who likes to jump around in lecture hall. SINCE WHEN? I mean right from the start, did i even attend lecture? Hahaha

To round up the day, we went to find Mr Leow, my great old entre advisor. I dunno if the shirt he's wearing goes well on him, but he looks exceptionally dashing today leh. LOL!
Anyway, he gave me a few good tips on leading a purposeful life in UK. Drink and travel make up part of his life there. According to him, i should book my air tix for vacation few months earlier. He actually got his Paris ticket for 5 pounds which is 16 times cheaper than mine. -.-
Finding the right time to the right place is of paramount importance to me now. I mean dont visit Finland (Xmas island) in summer and go Cambridge in winter right? LOL!

I want Egypt for the pyramids, Italy for scenery, Greece for that debt, lol their history awes me, Germany to see the ww2 Concentration camps, Amsterdam for their live sex bars, lol villa parks and USA for Tricia lol universal studio Orlando and Las Vegas!
Based on how i see it, having only 2-3 breaks in an academic year makes 6 countries ideal currently. Economics talk about scarcity and choice, so ultimately, i dun mind giving up everything for my mother in Singapore. LOL!

I sleep way too early nowadays which contributes to the insomnia either at 2am or 6am. Books i've borrowed is not sleep alluring and internet is borrriinnggg. My body is not behaving the right way and that discourage me from headin out to have fun. Well at least my niece is here to patronise me though there are times she can get irritated. For eg, i only say i wanna steam her fighting fish. LOL! This is childlike not childish ;P

2010-07-27T08:20:00.000-07:00

I'm blessed with a good memory to remember how i met each and every one of my good friend in life, and that goes to say the same for Tricia as well. Despite being in the same course for 3yrs in NP, we only managed to be in the same class for the last semester. Though it was late, i'm glad we did acquaint each other in the end.

During those times in UK, the only person who can share my happiness or woes at night is Tricia, since the time lapse between Manc & LA is short. Regardless how hectic my timetable was back then, i would very much attempt a video chat with her because to be in touch with a friend who can understand you is truly a pleasant thing.
I know sometimes you're afraid to voice out your thoughts with the fear of influencing me, but rest assured, those advices are really good. It did pick me up at the spot i fell and encourage me to conquer the heights :)

I smile at the thought of you heading back real soon since we've many promises here. LOL so stop complaining that i left SG later and come back earlier than you. You've ditched your holidays for summer school and that's the price to pay :P
Do walk around the flight often to avoid leg swelling and watch as many movies as possible with that 18hours flight. HAHAHA try harry potter 1 to 5 la
Speaking about that, bring me to Universal Studio Orlando for the newly opened Harry Potter amusement park in my yr 3!!!!!!!!!!

I thank you for everything and have a safe trip back to Singapore!
* Missing your maths qns, emotional chat, dumb jokes, keyboard playing and those trivial but significant things during webcam session.

2010-07-23T02:08:00.001-07:00

Emirates want 75pounds for a flight change. There are no seat availability for those dates i've chosen, unless i'm willing to do a upgrade. If i head back earlier, I most probably will visit another city, preferably Bath. It's up to me though my mum prefers to pay and keep me longer here.

Ever since i moved house, i often find myself tracing the routes of each bus located near my premises. LOL i feel like a computerized robot with my brain spreading out the whole mind map for me to analyze.
Past few days' incidents have made me pretty disappointed with the public transportation.
For this reason, i'm very interested to discuss about cars with my guy friends right now because i want my personal car :)

Anyway, i made a visit to NUH this morning. For some reason, i came out late and to find myself stupidly alighting at NUS instead of NUH. WOAH 1 bus stop away is... argh.
To run in the drizzle is nothing but to reach there on time and had to wait for another hour half is dumb. Effectiveness, yet to know. Efficiency definitely fails big time.

Something worth mentioning is the amount of medicine those inpatients bought in the pharmacy. For once i thought to myself: WOW they eat medicine like eating sweets leh. Then, my doctor prescribed me just as much or maybe slightly smaller bag?

The numerous times i interacted with my niece and nephew changed my view on having kids next time. That's the only time i can get childish without feeling uncomfortable; to click with kids you shld behave like a kid rite. They are loved for their innocence and naive nature.
For instance:
Niece :偷 what is legal.
Me: 心.
Mum: kiss.
Niece: 偷笑!
I think all adult's minds are corrupted. HAHAHA
If you don't believe me, try asking them some very straightforward riddle. It turns out that we, young adults are always thinking too much about it.

To end off, erm actually i'm experiencing the saturated feeling tt i once felt abt SG. It's too small to trap my big dreams. HAHAHAH that's a joke.

2010-07-20T05:38:00.000-07:00

Hehehe i accidentally hit my leg real hard against the bed front last night. The pain was so intense that i've some problem sleeping and this morning i was limping everywhere i go. Niceeee!

Does it sound unbelievable if i were to say i am excited about school in Sep? LOL having chosen the modules of my interest, everything seems fantastic thought all are based on stats, maths and econs. My timetable intimidated me a little but no fear, because i believe i can conquer!
What a classic motivation line that i've been using past sem. :D

I really like UOM's graduation attire maybe because of the school color (Gold & Purple) which seems so royal. Oh well, another 2 years to goooooo, hopefully people i wanna see will turn up at the ceremony.

2010-07-17T08:46:00.000-07:00

17/07/10
Apparently, Singapore is keeping me very relaxed and free for everything, including blogging. Dont you realize i blog more than as ever? Today happened to mark exactly 1 month back in SG!
That means im actually left with 2 more months to hell again, should Emirates refuse to give me a flight change. I know the importance of being positive but raising my expectations high up isnt a good way to cheer me on.

Anyway life in SG is pretty a bore after some time, sometimes it reminds me of the emphasis i placed on this reason to leave SG. Nevertheless i still love Singapore more than any other country, lol it's my homeland, a place where i belong!
In relation to that, occasionally i fear my friends or family introducing me to people with the inclusion of the return from UK part. Because the following will usually happen:
People: WOW u went uk, that means u r very rich leh!
Me: No, i am not. (You cant expect me to ans yes rite)
People: How long more to go?
Me: 2 yrs.
People: Oh very fast 1 laaa
Me: Not really
People: No it's really fast, just a blink of ur eye (the talk continues), anyway what course are you doing?
Me: Economics
People: Eh good leh, next time be a banker. Good future sia
Me: Oh orh (it nv crossed my mind to be a banker :S)
All in all, i just dun want people to have the misconception that heading for overseas studies is such a big thing and inflate unwanted expectation that brings abt higher disappointment.

I think the biggest reap from this holiday is my view towards friendship. No doubt it remains as a priority but i definitely reduce the emphasis placed on it. They just create unwanted disappointment.
It's pretty sad to have to feel that you are the one disappointing yourself when it's apparent that your friends let you down. You forgive the person by putting the blame on yourself bcoz u wanna him/her to continue being part of your life again. If you decide to put that friend on the hatred list and ignore him/her, after some time with your anger subsided, how sure are you that you wont regret those lost times where you guys can hang out together? And if you dont do so, your friends literally takes you for granted, isnt it?

A friend of mine came up with a note on this - he believes that we should only invest time and effort in a friendship that is mutual. I agree.

2010-07-15T07:13:00.000-07:00

Actually i fear people asking me the date i would leave for Manchester again. Last year's departure was alright perhaps with the presence of all my good buddies and i've no idea on its culture and environment. Those times in winter and during exams when homesickness hits me was really unbearable. Till now, it remains deeply etched in my mind, the thought of me returning back to undergo it again simply intimidated me.

While my mum made preparation via the purchases for my baggage, i am trying to get myself mentally geared for next year challenges. Last year's study method no doubt gave me the results i wanna but was not wholly flawless. Maybe i need a timetable to discipline myself. :)
Anyway, i promise to socialize more this coming term, to more social events as well as go and irritate my cliques more. HAHAHA
I am giving myself a second chance to seriously start afresh :D

2010-07-12T08:31:00.000-07:00

I suddenly feel the urge to do an entry on ''Change". Indeed it's true- the only constant thing is change. Transition stage which I feel is the most difficult part of growing up has somewhat added substantial amount of worries to friends whom i've encountered.
Despite being at the age of 21, i realize many of us do feel pretty old somehow which perhaps is attributed to our lifestyle and attitude towards learning and life.

Before i left for UK, most of them were just beginning to start their undergraduate studies or have begun their working life. My impression then was that everyone was merely learning how to walk, trying to accept responsibility. Guess what, i really suffer a shock after my return to see that almost all are on the right path towards being a real adult. Just look at the case of driving, people whom always appear timid to me are driving like jay chou in Initial D. LOL. What i've underestimated is not their capability but their speed of growth. Regardlessly, i am happy for all :)

Haha i wanna shout out how much i fear growing up but the happiness found in that stage is apparently 1 form that we cant find now. Are you excited about the future? ;)
As for that I just adopted a new life philosophy - take it as it comes. :)
I am just waiting for the day where i can change my priority in life, as for now i shall stick to the usual 1 :D

2010-06-26T06:56:00.000-07:00

26/06/10
It feels so different to be able to blog from SG once again. For all those who are not aware, I'm back from UK for a 3mth holidays here. The only people who are updated on my arrival dates are my family and Tricia Tay. I didnt mean to lie but thought a surprise might be interesting.

Jetlag was a very abhorrent thing with the effect of exhaustion. My exams officially ended on the 9th, Finland trip started on the 11th and was back to Manchester on the 14th, before leavin SG on the 16th. The 1 day gap in between was only sufficiently for me to do a bit of shopping, laundry, packing and transferring. -.-
Needless to say on the 16th, I was over the moon. It has never occurred to me i was gonna be home the very next day. Apparently on that day, i was almost late for the check in, thanks to this bus who purposely bypassed me. The comforting thing to know is, i managed to do a online check in b4 i left home and hence was given the privileges of the advance queue. :D

There was a 50min flight delay because the earlier one arrived at a later time. LOL fine, as long as i can reach home the next day, they can take their time. Aha the Englishman who sat next to me was extremely helpful; rendering me assistance regardless whether i was in need of any. This is what you call - intimidated by his friendliness. :D
As a result of the earlier delay, I managed to bump into Rachel at my stopover in Dubai. HAHAHA this is so fated, we've tried so much to be in the same flight and now for the 2nd one, we managed to get together, though in different seats.
Again, due to technical breakdown, we were delayed another 50minutes on the Emirates plane back to SG. It's fine again because i was happily asleep :)
Overall the Emirates experience was fairly alright, provided if you do not compare with other airlines. I caught tooth fairy and princess diaries in this 14hrs flights!

The weekend was pretty bad with the lags, headaches and fever. Nevertheless, I still head out with my mum to do random shopping. Anyway, the 1st friend that i met up with was Kristine Kow! Perhaps it's been quite some time since i last met everyone face to face, i experienced great discomfort during all the meet ups. Economics studies must have nullified my senses since i occasionally find myself struggling to give comments or make inquiries. Honestly, i really really really really really really don't know what to say. As for now, i am treating it as a feeling of overwhelmed and not the fact that our friendship has drifted away. Ha now i fear meeting my friends. I hope the next round of friends meeting is better.
High expectations in UK on the comeback turns out to be great disappointment. At this point of time, i did wonder if i've made the bad choice in heading back.

Josh gave me a piece of advice that enlightened me somewhat: Create a garden instead of chasing the butterflies with a net. Friends are like butterflies constantly flying around, it's not easy to catch hold of them. However by tending my garden well enough, butterflies will come on its own. :)

What happened to those stuff on my to do list? 3months is really short and i've no idea how to go about cherishing it.

2010-05-30T04:10:00.000-07:00

30/5/10

Taking 6 modules in 1 semester has poignant consequences on my life. I don't know if it's a good thing to spread 6 papers across 1 month. No doubt there's much time for preparation but it locks up unnecessary time and creates unintentional pressure.
Politics + Finance + Development + Sociology + Econs + Statistic = Brutal combination of tremendous intensity and horrendous workload.
Trust me, i learnt this lesson hard.

This is my final huddle before i will show up perfectly in Singapore once again. After 9 months of not seeing each other, I wonder how my emotions will fluctuate. Infrastructure changes but have you guys changed as well?
Honestly, I was pretty touched at SG excessively rapid development within such a short period of time. The IRs, Helix bridge, Universal Studio, Circle Line and those minor yet significant structures that i currently have no idea about. You cant deny it makes you feel proud to be her citizen. Appreciation for SG education system and competitiveness will seep in after you've seen the rest of the overseas students fare in UK.

Looking back, I cant seem to figure out how i managed to tide through all the obstacles. It's seriously a challenge which is deeply etched in me. Indeed, what doesn't kill me will make me stronger.
One thing for sure, I am no longer that ignorant little girl. :)

Due to the time lapse and hectic timetable of my friends, I usually get very lonely in the night. When things happen and you've no one to consult, that's like... facing the king cobra alone. With the power of faith, gradually I came to accept that as being part and parcel of life. At the end of the day, we are the master of our own fate.
Life is much more interesting than I assume, as compared to those ppl sufferin in the developin country, deprive of capability and hence freedom to choose, i ought to cherish whateva i've now. Optimism shall stay in me :)

Economics has shown that success and failure lie at the intersection of the personal and social. Having a sense of direction in life is nonetheless impt but treasuring the relational ties around you is equally crucial. I believe in life there are a lot of roundabout, it's a matter of whether you wanna take it after realizing you gt lost.
I dunno who's reading, since i've nt locked my blog, but hopefully it serves the purpose of inspiring.

I'll be off to Finland for my rightful long vacation before touching down in SG.
I'll see you soon ;)

2010-03-29T15:09:00.000-07:00

I am inspired somehow to do a quick entry here.

As a result of constant allergy attack, i am currently on my 2nd dose of antibiotics. Actually i contemplated for a long time on the consumption since the possible side effects encompass not only frequent headache and visual disturbances (from the raised pressure on the brain) but also chest pain (swelling of heart membrane) ETC.
Having a sensitive body system means I am actually experiencing a lot of bodily reactions. :S

Easter break has been pretty enriching with my vacation to Blackpool as well as Paris. 4 days of Paris left me 300 pounds poorer but a break once in a while did refresh my mind. (LOL i actually went to 7 cities in a short 6months! - London, Liverpool, Birmingham, Leeds, York, Trafford and Blackpool)

Except for this highlight, leading an independent study life in UK is torturing. Initially i came here with well defined life goals and a determined attitude to achieve, but subsequently I found them to be overshadowed by peer influence and externalities. Thankfully, I managed to pick myself up during a reflection done in easter break. Now, i dun really care.
Undeniably, the long 6 mths here have trained me to being a stronger person equipped with the necessary survival skills and valuable academical knowledge. They'll definitely be put to good use.

Above all these, I've learnt about appreciation and cherishing the little things in life. Sometimes I feel that everything in life is predestined, somehow things are arranged in a manner for us to gain enlightenment. My departure has inadvertently enhanced my friendship with my good buds. I thank everyone for putting in the effort to come online and entertain/ patronize me, while i continued to rot in my room.
All these triggered me to think: What might have changed if we know each other earlier or perhaps attempt to strengthen this friendship prior to my decision of setting off? (Have i somehow revealed a part of the reason for leaving?) :D
The answer derived rationally is: People usually treasure things/people when they are gone. :)

I dunno why I kept on holding to this description of Pisces which i saw on a chain email - You are good to find, but hard to keep. To a certain extent, it might be true since i do have the tendency to neglect friends and erase them frm my memories. The only reason I could possibly think of is attributed to having no self confidence.
So if anything do happen to our friendship, don't dwell on the reason - it's probably my fault :)

On a lighter note, the only consolation is... I am coming home in less than 2 mths time. That's only my tentative schedule since my clique proposed the idea of heading _____ first. I am so gonna make up for the lost time during this short 3mth summer break :P
I really can't wait to see everyone once again. In fact homesickness has robbed me a few precious night of sleep. :S
You guys cant deny the fact that I am being missed! :P

2010-02-23T13:18:00.001-08:00

Many of you have been blabbering about my disappearance in blogger. LOL so here i am!
Just as per normal, a few highlights in my life.

Essay
What a joke to even include essay writing as a highlight. LOL! The similarity politic shared with sociology is: they are equally intellectually stimulating. My thought are flowing more logically than ever and my vocabulary has been expanded.
Like it or not, still have to endure.

Before 21st Birthday
The birthday card from my mum is the first to reach me this time round. This handmade card is special in a way that the borders are pasted with disney stickers and along with the card came 2 hearts made from SG notes. Most importantly, this is the 1st time my mum penned down her wishes for me! :D Honestly, I never know i would make a difference in anyone's life.

Before i forget, I thank everyone for telling me in advance about bdae gifts which are bound to be delayed for some reasons or so. :P Though the idea sound insincere, but the thoughts are appreciated. HAHA i am just joking la :)
It must have cost a bomb to do so, hence do tell me the price so i could reimburse accordingly. LOL!

My intention to spend 21st in SG is completely dashed with my departure to UK. No worries though, my mum is pretty opened to my proposal for a post 21st bdae celebration :) Yes, i admit this might sounds funny due to the time period lapse, therefore let's consider this more of a get together outing.

CNY dinner
If you are stalking me in FB, you might have noticed how i spent my CNY. A simple dinner with fellow indo chinese, msia and sporean mates in a Cantonese restaurant is the least i could do. Special thanks to my mum who only seek for my opinion to go back, few days before the start of CNY. Anyway it's only for a week or so, given the chance i would still stay in UK and rot.

Accomodation
While other are still fretting over their accomodation next year, I've already settled mine for a private hostel near to the school. UK might have really landed themselves into massive debts that they seriously need funds to tide over; all international students are required to pay in full even just for the booking of hostel. AHEM.
Actually, apartment was one of my options but choosing the right person to stay with is a good limiting factor. Either it strengthens or destruct a friendship depends largely on how strong the relationship is. Oh well hopefully, the person whom I wanna see in Manc will bring herself here and give me the opport to live in an apartment for my 3rd/4th year. You know, i am waiting ;)

York trip
The best trip I ever had this year is the York outing with my Indo Chinese friends. Everything was peacefully with no arguments or signs of debate throughout the trip. Adding on, having share the same temperament and personality, we could click with each other pretty well. HOHOHO cheers!
Beside London which totally rocks, York is simply a good place not to be missed!

Randoms
My expenditure has greatly increased for this whole month. Socializing, outing and purchases for bdae presents(SG & UK) are the key factors. :D

Friend's Death
The NTU girl whom jumped to her death in Toh Guan is actually one of my good pals in primary school. I only received the news after a week plus of her death when my mum finally bumped into me online. Needless to say, i cried for her. I couldnt help but think whether she did regret at the last min? Sigh, she must have reached her limits and so unfortunately no 1 was there for her at that point of time.

Not too sure if it's pure coincidence, I kept dreaming about her recently. The 1st time was spooky where i had a glimpse of her lying in the coffin and being cremated. Just few days ago in my dream, I was talking to her face to face. The creepiest part wasnt about her being disfigured but lies in her remarks. She said she was still alive and that i should keep it a secret from others. Just like what i did to her for the last msn conv exchanged, I told her I need to go off and will be back to see her then.
OH MY GOODNESS GRACIOUS. I woke up instantly.

My mum and my friends did reject my intention to visit her upon my return. I do not blame them for being superstitious bcoz perhaps it's for my own good. What a regret, we had promises to go to many places together. Seemingly, you'll only cherish the person after losing them.
GJR please RIP, if we are fated, we'll continue to be friends next life :)

2010-01-30T18:15:00.001-08:00

Thursday
As a result of a msn chat, i was late for the meetup with Didi and Adi. Thank goodness, they bought a very decent and classy brand of perfume for Chen's birthday. Though i didnt get to smell it, but the packaging looks appealing enough to impress! Cheers cheers cheers!

I lost the last set of bowling game in Wii to Didi because of a strike. LOL what a waste, I thought I could thrash him! :P
Indeed Wii is a very motivating game, because it appears that you are able to do all the amazing stunts with just an easy touch of the remote. For whatever reasons, as long as everyone can bond under the gaming station in a healthy way, it's a great entertainment tool :)

Friday 30/1
After mths of not swimming, I finally had one with Didi at Manchester's Aquatic Centre! Staying here seems to have trained my patience well, bcoz i hardly mind him for being dead late :D
Conclusion for swimming session: I can still do every stroke pretty well though my stamina has gone down. The LG on duty even told me to move to a faster lane. :D

Didi cooked Spore's style of prawn noddles for us, what luck! Given the circumstances, I mean there is no way one should be picky about the standard. HAHAHA
Still, thank you so much for the awesome lunch, it's greatly appreciated!
Before hitting town, we had a stopover at Weston Hall in order to change to a warmer clothing. Winter just refused to go away, that's the con side of living in a country with 4 seasons.

Night time saw us heading to Jason Michael's place for a little birthday celebration. The turnout for the party wasnt so great as far as I've seen, apparently many of his friends decided to back out at the eleventh hour. This sets me thinking about a lot of things. Sometimes in life, good people gets nothing while bad guys receive all. Occasionally, we ought to self reflect on our contribution as a pal. :)

Saturday
My msn chat with a good friend was interrupted as a result of a birthday celebration that needs to be attended. I feel really bad abandoning my friend online at the lowest point of her life. For all the reasons, I am really sorry :)

In approximately 15mins, I managed to get dressed and dashed out of my room. LOL it's not nice to keep people in waiting especially a big group which includes the birthday girl herself. I was literally surrounded by 16 Indonesians in this birthday party held at a Spanish restaurant. The red wine was the best ever drunk by me: sweet and strong.

After the dinner, the whole gang dropped by Didi's place to hang out. Gladly, there are enough stuff to keep everyone entertained. :)

I will curb my alcohol intake this month, simply had a bit too much these 2 days.
:S

Sunday
The most shocking news to Phebe is for her to know that i attended church session today. Beside accompanying Carolyn, my whole intention is to be exposed to a different experience in order to better understand Phebe Tay. LOL sounds like a joke to you, but honestly that's how i feel :)

Throughout the 1.5hours session, there were times I was dumbfounded by everyone's enthusiasm to spread love and rejoice about their life. Adding on to make this a lovely experience is the reading of bible which I personally think it's an intellectually stimulating storybook. LOL!
Yup, as expected I casted all the newly learnt religious terms on both of them which definitely entertained or annoyed them to a great extent. HAHAHA told you so, I can apply these stuff really well :P

The day was well spent with Adi, Carolyn as well as with Chen Chen and her boyfriend. Carolyn brought us to Asda for grocery shopping and Chen Chen cooked us baked rice. The chat over at Victoria place with was certainly comforting. I really look forward to living with them next year :) That would be what i really called a home.

School officially starts tomorrow again.
So much that i dreaded it, but well let's go!

2010-01-27T15:58:00.001-08:00

While some students are still working their head off, I am having much time on my hands to kill. Exams preparation and Leeds trip have totally drained me both physically and emotionally. What i need is a serious good rest; preferably much sleep and enjoying my freedom.
My biological clock is back to normal once again, for now i would sleep at night and not in the early morning, and my habit of waking up in the afternoon is kicked.

Life sometimes in UK gets more complicated than in SG, little did I know about the complexities embedded in this culture would be SO significant, till I experienced it myself. Even a joke told can be understood differently by the different culture present here. What appears logical and morally upright in your sense might not mean exactly to others - which means for everything you are on, please do not assume the same for others.
Quoting Tricia Tay, the world is like a spider web, everything is interconnected. Yes, for what ever things you do, there are far reaching implications. It's no longer about you and you alone, unknowingly the people around you wld be affected.
(So sociology but the logic applies)

I would feel the hardest part of independency is about controlling your emotions and thoughts well. Often alone in the lonely cold night, negative thoughts could easily evade your mind, dampening your whole mood and rendering life for the moment dull.
Am i not adjusting correctly to UK environment?

Mind and body is 1, which explains why my mind is so corrupted now.
I'll try out my new speeding ropes (skipping) tomorrow morning ;)

2010-01-21T16:03:00.000-08:00

Exams
Unlike the rest of the students whose exams last till next week, mine have officially ended this afternoon. Despite taking only 3 exams, i swear it did give me more pressure than I've ever experienced in Poly. It's seriously not easy being a perfectionist, because not only results matter but achieving my very own expectations is of paramount importance as well. Honestly speaking, I am disappointed for not performing at my optimal standard. Nonetheless, it's against my principles to cite any reasons for failure, though away from home is severely a critical factor.
No matter how tough the module is or how much of negative externalities around you, it's still my responsibility to deal with it. The yearning for home was especially intense during examination, to the extend of me wanting to head back SG right away. Then I knew it was just a loser feeling, some form of escape from reality. What a loser kind of feeling.

Too much of sociology studies have piqued my urge to address the issue of complement and compromise. Undeniably, both elements are viewed important in sustaining a relationship. I always hear people agreeing to compromise for their other half, but why didnt anyone thought of complementing their partner?
From my perspective, compromise is more of a 'social construct' which changes with the situation, and usually at the expense of one. Whereas complement is fixed - biological imperative; more of finding someone who shares the same value, habits, character or personality as you so that both can fit nicely into each other's life.
Then again, finding one that matches you is sometimes about fate :)

I've been hunting down on youtube videos recently for some cool songs to listen with Tricia Tay. :D
Did I tell you about my infatuation in Cheryl Cole? AWWW she is extremely goregous with that pair of enchanting eyes, the radiant smile and the lovely little dimples! Ashley Cole is indeed a lucky fellow :P
Another singer worthy of appreciating is Celine Dion, who never fails to carry a certain kind of charm with her, regardless the past or now.

Have a break!
Phew, with the exams over and having missed out on decent celebrations for both Christmas and new year, I'll be heading to Leeds over the weekend. :)

My 1st new year resolution might sound like a joke to everyone: Sleep early. LOL :)
On top of the possibilities, healthy living will see that i tone up my body by doing more swimming or running. HAHAHA

2010-01-03T18:57:00.000-08:00

Air ticket browse
Air tickets are really expensive from Manchester to Singapore. My mum finds the price pretty worthwhile while i think it'll make me bleed.
Besides that, there are many options available for selection - the number of stopovers, the timing to reach and of course, most importantly, the arrival and departure date. I learnt pretty much for a simple task of browsing through the airlines' respective official site.
Anyway, it's just a research LOL!

Gratitude
Life has been turning for the better after i lower down or rather hold no expectations in life. Somehow somewhere i will be surprised with little actions by my mates in SG and the particular one in USA. Firstly, i must dedicated my gratitude towards those who spent !#!%$!#@ to send me xmas card or gift. After doing a random check, i was brought to attention that my poly mates cant seem to spell my name correctly! Everyone puts in the spacing to derive Huang Se Ling. Claimed to be a form of creativity, Jasmine Lin eliminated the space but capitalised the L - Huang SeLing. WOAH, they are the same isnt it?? Haha i dunno why, perhaps bcoz of the childhood joke made, i am pretty sensitive towards this issue. LOL no worries though, it's your style, i can understand.

It's kinda heart warming to know that my friends are still keeping a lookout for me despite distance apart. The comments on the facebook, regardless how short the msg can be, they are still significant to me. Cheers to all!

Friend's visit
The idea of friends coming to visit me thrilled me very much. I've been constantly updated on friends' arrival at UK either for exchange or studies. Great deal, this means more vacations to interesting cities, above more... once again bonding with very old yet easy going friends :)
Aha so i miss the sense of familiarity.

Hopefully, everything goes according to plan. :)

2009-12-30T16:04:00.001-08:00

Meet up with primary school teacher 23/12/09
Amazingly, i met up with my fav pri school teacher, Miss Loh, at Manchester for lunch, after not seeing each other for ard 6yrs in SG. Indeed, we never know what the future holds for us; it's simply beyond my imagination to even think about any outside interaction with her.
Should i consider this as an expired wish that comes true? :)

Despite the existence of awkwardness, we managed to talk really broadly without any teacher-student restriction - school politics, culture adaptation, future career path, cross cultural marriage, driving, basically anything under the sun. What touches me is how much she can actually rem me, taking into acct the time period of 10 years.
What a feeling - i felt as if everything is a dream, wonderful dream.
More determinedly assured: A deeply etched impression can never be erased despite the flow of time.

Shopping for straight 3 days
Working in UK is definitely relaxed, regardless which occupation, they seem to take breaks very often. Needless to say, efficiency is dead low - I am never served immediately. Unless you can make it sound like emergency, if not everything is about scheduling appointment.

Straight after lunch with chen chen and adi, we headed town for some shopping. Believe me, the sale as well as the crowd is so much crazier than in SG. Sometimes some thing in life is really fated, after 1 big round we can still gt hold of the stuff that we once intended to get is really fabulous:)
Anyway, the 3 days of shopping robbed me off 77 pounds, approximately $175 sgd for just 4 items - 3 zara and 1 mackenzie items. LOL no no dun misunderstand me, i aint filthy rich just that ZARA is pretty affordable here :)
Adi said he always shop in Hangten with his parents but yet Zara or Topman with me. LOL what does that imply man! Soon to come, i believe he will visit Ted Baker or Hugo Boss, just a matter of time ;)

With Jeff gone to Scotland and assuming my new flatmate is away as well, i am proud to be the only tenant in my flat right now. HAHA, no worries i am not afraid of loneliness or whateva ghosts or spirits. There's no such things over here, except in those hundred year old castle or church la. Living alone isnt a bad idea after all, you can walk around naked without afraid of being seen. HAHAHA (i am kidding).

My sole got pricked by this unknown rusty metal stick found lying on my room's carpet today. WOAH the pain was so distinct and intense that instantly i jumped up. Guess what, i couldnt walk! While seated on the floor, i noticed another needle. WOAH! Is the earlier prick a blessing in disguise? Seriously, i've no needles in my room. Come on, do i look like i sew? :D
I hope the reception opens soon and for a longer period of time so that i could report the loss of vacuum cleaner in my flat.

Been doing a reasonable amt of cooking in Adi's place recently to kill time. For instance, i cooked green bean soup, pasta, fries, pizza, noodles etc. LOL not surprise okay, i can cook all along. All these contributed by the home econ knowledge i picked up in sec sch and credits to my visualization ability - i'll usually chat wif my mum when she cooks.

Lambert's shortage of water
I had a great laugh when Adi's hostel water pipe ruptured resulting in a water shortage. The chances of it happening in Weston hall is slim, considering that we have 5 cores, with ard 5 levels on each core, 3 flat in level and 8 people in each flat. LOL!
Come on imagine hw many complaint letters they will receive if that shortage happens here. AND yes, unlike pankhurst, we wont have fire alarm drill in the middle of the night at all :P

Christmas eve
There were 2 parties to attend during the eve but sadly we ended up in Lambert eating pizza. We failed to board the last bus at 745 to wilmslow apartment where the indo clan was gathered for dinner. I wouldnt mind walking if it's summer but hell no in this weather to pace for ard 2 mrt stations.

Returning back to weston hall for Jeff's party was met with yet another disappointment. Visualize this: In a room of bright lighting, a group of China nationals all seated in sofa chatting, with potato chips as food and jay chou song as background music. Is this the new age of party? Perhaps i am so used to the clubbing kind of atmosphere. Ahem.

Not too bad actually, esp when you can self entertain yourself very well. LOL the crackers in Adi's common room is really stupid. OH MAN!

Trafford Centre
Andy drove us (Adi, Imelda and me) to Trafford Centre for some shopping today! For more info, just refer to my fb :)